A lost life
by Tai-Inuyoukai-Kagome
Summary: The truth shall be revealed. Will kagome forgive her present to try and remember her past? will sesshomaru understand her fears? Just give me a chance and get passed the first Chapter it gets interesting. leave me a review even if you don't like it.
1. Leaving It All Behind

**A Lost Life**

**Chapter One**

**Leaving It All Behind**

She was sitting at her dinning room table. Her house was immaculate, as it always was. Her husband and her kid was sleeping. Her life boring and beyond fair, She and her husband had gotten into it earlier that day she felt like she had enough, she didn't know what more to do. So she stood up with all her strength and all her might, packed a couple of things, she could get too without waking her family, she headed out the door not knowing exactly where she was going. It was cold, and light flurries of snow, about four blocks from her home she ran into a man who was coming around the corner. He stood their strong and powerful. She could see his snow-white hair that almost hung down to the ground he had on a type of black suit with a black leather trench coat. The color of his clothes was so black that it blended in with the darkness that faded behind him. With the snow flurrying down she couldn't see his face that well, but the words that came out of his mouth hit her like a brick. "I know you are strong, but trust me this is not the time." With that he disappeared as quickly as he had come. How did he know what she was going through? She stopped cold in that thought. Taking this stranger's words to heart she turned around and headed back to the home that felt more like hell than home.

Days passed by turning into weeks and then the weeks turning into months living her life every day the same, nothing changing. Every night though she had dreams of him. The dreams of him kept her going, what he said in the dreams warmed her even on the coldest night. Always the same thing and he always looked the same way. The faceless stranger always showing in the midnight dark, always saying:

"Don't be sad, please don't cry."

"I'm not there to wipe the tear from your eye."

"Laugh a little laugh, Smile a little Smile,"

"I Promise it will be ok in a little while."

Then a night came that the dream changed, Instead of his normal voice saying those words so beautiful to her ear, His voice was rougher and almost commanding but sincere, the words were different, and she wasn't at home in her bed. She was standing on that same corner but this time it was sunny and warm out there was no snow or rain and she was standing right in front of him once again. He said swiftly. "The promise has been fulfilled. It has been a while." With that he disappeared, this mystical creature. It touched her just like the words he said before had. She knew when she woke up that the time had come for her strength to move her on. So as the morn came, she sent her kid to school like a normal routine all along knowing there was nothing normal about the morning. She went home and once again packed her things knowing now something was going to be different she had that feeling deep down.

As she reached the corner to her house, she searched around with her eyes thinking of the direction in which she should go. Looking back at the home in which she was leaving, she remembered and flashed back to the reasons. The pain that home held for her she knew she needed to remember everything at that moment so she can leave it behind. And never have any regrets. She spent the first day walking wherever the road went usually not lighted areas and country roads just to be on the safe side. The sad part people usually think that would have been a bad way to keep safe especially for a woman but in her case it was a good thing for the secrets she hid deep from everyone would not find her. She reached a cemetery she was too tired to really notice the name but she decided to go deep in the back to lie down and sleep for she wanted not to be found. She fell asleep for no longer than three hours when she awoke to a touch unfamiliar to her. Flinching, she jerked away, not sure what blow to expect. When realizing that the man who stood before her was not one of pain but was one of comforting, she wiped her eyes to make sure she was seeing clearly. And there he stood in all his glory. His moon white hair floating down to the ends of his feet, The deep but bright color of blue like you see at the bottom of a flame in his eyes, And an aura of fire. His skin shone brightly like a ghostly appearance. She reached up feeling for once in a long while safe. He pulled her from his standing position to where her eyes met his.

She looked deep into those tell all eyes and with curiosity asked "have you been stalking me. How did you know I was here? And are you really here."

"No need to stalk you, yes I am really here, and I was on my morning run and found you here."

"But it is you right? The man from that night? The man from my dreams? The feeling I get from you I know it is you?" she was even more confused now.

"Hmm, are you sure you are ok. I don't know exactly what dreams or what night you are talking about. But I know that I am here and if you need me for anything I am glad to help." He looked at her questioningly not wanting to make her think she was crazy.

Being an emotional wreck, she broke down, Right in front of this almost stranger. She told him of her dreams of him and that night the first time she tried to walk away. Just wanting him to understand she wasn't crazy she knew and felt it was he.

"I don't think you to be crazy. Things happen in life that are sometimes unexplainable. Is there something I can help you with? Anything you need. I want to make sure you are all right. Someone you wish to call maybe?"

She quickly replied "no, no one to call I will be fine. Thank you for your concern."

"I can tell you are having problems of some sort. I wish there was something more I could do. I am so sorry to wake you from your slumber"

"No but if I may ask one question, what is your name? Who are you?"

"My name? My name is . . . " he stuttered for a minute as if he had forgotten who he was "Eric Morris. It is nice to meet...mmm... what is your name?" he said with a sly grin.

"My name is Kagome Higurashi."

"I wish I could carry on this conversation Kagome, if I may but I must get to work. Maybe we will see each again?"

"I would like to but I am not sure where I am at? I don't really know where I am going. I am just going."

"Well I can tell you where you are, and maybe someday where you are going, but for now you are in Shellron." If she had been paying fuller attention, she would have noticed that he knew more than what he led on to know, but it didn't faze her.

"Shellron wow I didn't realize I have gone that far. Well thank you."

"If you would like, I live here outside of town we could go get my vehicle and I can take you in town or you can come use my phone. I would hate to leave you out here like this, but it just wouldn't feel right." He replied.

"I really have no one to call. Thank you though"

"Well at least let me get you a room for the night and some food. You look exhausted?"

"Well I don't know, but I am kind of hungry and still a little tired. But why would you do that for me?" she asked.

"Well I can't just leave you out here you should rest at least until you know where you are going."

It hit her like lightening he had mentioned earlier that he could tell her where she was going, it started sending little shivers up her spine. "I remember what you said earlier do you feel that you know where I am going." She asked.

"No, not at all, how would I know that, I can just tell by your reaction that it is somewhere far from here." He said smirking.

She threw him a question look, still uneasy with his answer, but knew that she was really hungry and she was exhausted, so she looked at him and said "I would appreciate it, thank-you."

"Appreciate if I tell you where to go?" he asked knowing full well of what she meant.

"No, I was talking about the room and food." She mumbled.

"Oh I see," he chuckled "not a problem, this way."

With that she started with him back to his home. About three country blocks she looked up to see what looked like something of a farmhouse as big as one but she could tell by the style, this man was not a farmer. The wooden outlook the trees surrounded almost its entirety. If it wouldn't have been for him, she probably would not have even seen it. She slowly and cautiously walked up the drive toward this beautiful home when she reached his truck she said "I will wait out here."

"That is fine I will go and change and I will be out in a bit to take you into town you are welcome to come in though if you like?"

"Well yea maybe I should while you get ready." She said starting toward him a little uneasy about the whole suddenness of the situation.

He walked up and unlocked the door, reaching his arm out to her and to motion her to proceed before him into his domain. She responded and slowly walked in the front door. Her mind overloaded her with what she found inside. A winding staircase sat in front of her. It had a brown glow like it was inviting her to see what was up there. He said "Will you be all-right while I go get ready?"

"Yes I will be fine. Thank-you."

"Well make yourself at home, look around if you like I will be upstairs for a few. I will be back in a minute." With that he left her standing there to tour his home. She looked down at the hard wood floor beneath her; it almost looked like it had been freshly waxed. She approached the middle of the room that was off to the staircase it was very open turned into carpet had a fireplace and furniture she would have always imagined owning. With a powerful mystical feeling flowing in the air, she found there not to be any pictures on the wall, kind of strange for something as beautiful as this to be so bare. But she dare not question why. She decided she didn't want to see much more still a little uneasy of being there. She decided to sit on his couch in front of the fireplace. Looking down at the coffee table she noticed a simple word carved in it. What it meant she had no clue and who put in there even bothered her a little. But it said Kannon that was it. She was made to wonder if this man was married, would his wife come in and see her there and think she was doing something wrong. She decided to stand up and wait at the mantle.

Meanwhile, the man upstairs getting dressed was constantly thinking about the beautiful woman downstairs. He wanted to know how to approach her with the information he had on her. How would she respond if she actually knew who he was? Would she feel betrayed? He was intrigued by her ignorance of who she was. He got dressed and went back downstairs to see her standing at the mantle. It felt right she belonged there. He finally spoke, "You like my place? I would really like to have time to talk with you; my door is open if you would like to speak."

"Thank you. I appreciate the offer. Maybe someday right now I have way too many issues." She stated with a sly laugh.

"Well I just wanted to make it known. Come let's go"

With those lines they hopped into his truck and headed for town not many words spoken. Both to uneasy knowing the other needed something that the other could probably give but both too bull headed to say something. He went and took her to a restaurant. He gave her twenty dollars and said "eat well and get some good sleep if you do decide you need anything I work at Florans Stock Market."

"Thank you. I wish I could repay you and someday I promise I will."

With that once again he disappeared, but the man she knew was from her dreams. Where was this going to lead and should she stay in the room or keep moving? She decided to go eat and decide what to do after that she sat down and ate. You could tell she was starving the way she ate she acted like she had not eaten in weeks. The gentleman once again reappeared; it had only been about twenty minutes.

"What are you doing back? I thought you were going to work?" she asked

"Well I realized that you didn't have enough for a room too around here. I wanted to make sure that you stay in a room so you can get some sleep. I wanted to bring you these keys. I have gotten a room for you. It is at the red roof inn right up the street here, and if you wouldn't mind I would like it if you would come over for supper tonight?" he said with a sort of all-knowing smile.

"Well thank-you I wasn't paying attention to how much I had. I appreciate it. Well I am going to go get some sleep. Call me there later and we will see about supper." All knowing that she had planned being gone before he would have called.

"Ok see you later." He said waving her goodbye.

She went to the red roof inn hotel down the street and saw that not only had he gotten her a room but he had gotten her a suite. She decided to take a hot shower she knew that she probably looked terrible and exhausted from the walk and sleeping in the cemetery. She was going to lie down when she noticed there was a hot tub in the room. Oh it was a magnificent hot tub. So she ran the water and decided to relax for a bit might as well enjoy what she has now. She had never been treated this well before and she couldn't figure out how come this man was being so nice to her. She had nothing to offer him but a broken life. She got out of the hot tub and without realizing what time it was decided to lie down and go to sleep she was mighty tired.

She was awoken five hours later by the phone ringing beside her. Damn she thought she had slept too long she wanted to be gone before he called. She didn't want to burden him any further, so she decided not to answer the phone. She got up grabbed her things and left the room with the phone still ringing. Long to her surprise he was calling her from downstairs. She ran right into him coming out of the elevator.

"Hi," she was being shy.

"Hi, why didn't you answer your phone?" he questioned her.

"I must have already left the room when you called." She said trying to not act like she ignored the phone.

"Oh well I had tried to call for the last hour. I will have them check on their phone here." He said knowing all to well her intentions.

"I am sorry." She said.

"Oh not your fault, Where you planning on leaving I noticed you had your things?" he asked looking at her radiant eyes.

"Well, yea, I didn't want to bother you anymore. I figured I must be going on my way." She said trying to slide by him.

"Wait a minute. You don't even know where you are going, No need to run off. Let me help you please?" he said grabbing her arm lightly to where she could have got away if she really wanted to.

"I don't know if there is any help for me." She could feel the tears starting to form in her eyes, but she didn't want to cry in front of this perfect stranger.

"Come just have supper with me, if I cannot show you that I can help you; then I won't stop you from leaving. Even though I feel like you should stay." He said to her with a confused look on his face as if his words had even shocked him. He had not meant to tell her that, he was shocked at his own slip. The confusion came from the fact that he still didn't know if he wanted to take that chance with her again.

"Ok," she said in almost low uncertain whisper.

They walked out of the Inn the whole time his hand caressing her elbow. He offered to carry her bag but she refused. He helped her up into the truck and shut the door behind her. What she had gotten herself into once more she had no clue, all she knew is that it had to better than being no where at all.

They arrived once again at his huge home out in the country. This time was different he had a servant come and greet him at the door. She had not noticed any servants earlier. And how much money did this man really have.

"Good evening sir, I have prepared a place setting for your guest. Dinner is ready." The servant almost bowed to the man.

"Thank-you Jaken, that will be fine, is Rin dressed and ready?"


	2. The Dinner

**CHAPTER TWO**

**THE DINNER**

"Yes my lord. She will be down soon." Answered Jaken.

With that Kagome and the man who told her his name was Eric walked into the front of the house. Right in front of the stairs she stood for a minute as if too questioned her actions. "It is ok Kagome you are welcome here." He said to her. With that Rin came running down the stairs "Daddy, your home." She said running up to him stopping right in front of him. "Hi Rin, I heard supper is ready, are you ready to eat?" he asked.

"Yes I am, Sess . . ." with that she ran off realizing she about uncovered his secret.

They headed into the dinning room with his hand still gently caressing her elbow. When they entered the dinning room, her eyes widened in amazement of how much food was presented before her on the table. It was like a giant banquet. Wow who could possible eat this much food she thought. The table was made of glass and there was expensive china on the table but she noticed instead of just three place settings there were six place settings. She started to get nervous was he planning on having more company. Within a moment, a woman of great stature, she seemed to glow like an angel. You could feel love flowing into the room. She didn't belong here and you could tell she didn't belong here.

"Well hello dear," she said as she went up and gently placed a kiss on his forehead. Oh shit this must be his wife Kagome thought. She totally felt like she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. He had led her to a seat and sat her down. He chose a seat next to her. Kagome was shocked to notice that Kannon had picked a seat away from him, not next to him.

"I forgot to tell you I wanted to let you know that I took the liberty of inviting a couple of friends to dinner I hope you don't mind." She said stating it frankly; as if she was so sure of herself she knew he wouldn't care. "They should be arriving shortly."

"That is fine," he stated you could tell it was a little agitated smile.

With the knock came banging at the door.

"They must be here." Kannon said "Jaken get the door." She was very commanding.

"I only answer to my master. Kannon and that is not you." Jaken replied snarling at her.

"Jaken this is neither the time nor the place, get the door, I will deal with you later." He said trying not to sound to commanding in front of Kagome. He didn't want to scare her and to make her think he was mean like is baka brother.

"Yes sir." Jaken sighed not to happy being commanded.

About a minute or two later, Two people entered into the dinning room. The woman walked up to Kagome and shocked her "Hi Kagome I am Sango."

How did she know her name, this was all getting strange to her. She wasn't so sure. She felt like this was all planned and she couldn't wait to find out what the rest of the plan was. "Well nice to meet you Sango"

"I am Miroku. It is nice to see you Kagome." Miroku said.

See her; she thought it was almost as if these people knew her. Did they? Did she not remember seeing them before? Well maybe it was just his way of going about things. "Hello," she said bowing her head low as to hide and not to have eye contact.

"Raise your head Kagome, it is ok we are all friends here." This man so-called Eric spoke with pride.

She did as to follow his instructions. Why this man was so nice to her she had no clue. They all started to eat, more and more she could feel herself retreating into herself. The room became closer and closer crowding in on her. Here she was in a gorgeous home with five people, and one green servant. First time she had ever seen someone like that but it didn't bother her too much. She didn't know why. Why did this guy have to be she thought? She noticed the eye contacts from across the room from Kannon to him. She could only suspect that his "wife" was a little jealous of her being there. Well after dinner she would be on her way so there would be no worrying about her. With that she put her head back down as to stare into her food.

"Well thank-you for the food and the introductions, it was nice to meet you all, and your wife." Kagome started to get up as if to leave when everyone heard what she had said. They all started to laugh and very loud laugh "what is so funny she asked?"

Kannon stood slowly not to startle Kagome, and gently walked over to her "Kagome, Sesshoumaru is not my husband he is my son." She said with a sly laugh.

"Oh," Kagome was shocked, wait a minute this woman said his name was Sesshoumaru. He had told her his name was Eric. Why had he lied? She turned toward Sesshoumaru and asked "you said your name was Eric, why didn't you tell me it was Sesshoumaru?"

"Here I am Eric. At my other home I am Sesshoumaru." That was the best way to explain it.

"I don't understand what other home?" Kagome asked.

"It is a long story; I wish I had time to explain it to you." Sesshoumaru was now uneasy realizing she was planning on bolting for the door any moment.

"Well it doesn't matter, thank-you for the dinner I must go now, before I go though can I use your restroom?" she asked.

"Yes, it is upstairs second door to the right." he pointed in the direction of the winding staircase.


	3. The Truth Surfacing

CHAPTER THREE

THE TRUTH SURFACING

Kagome left the tachi and headed up the winding staircase. On her way out of the restroom it was amazing it was like a door automatically opened for her. She couldn't help but to go see what was inside it was like an inner force was driving her. She walked into what seemed to be Sesshoumaru's bedroom but she was surprised. There was nothing hardly in there. There was a huge, old, wooden bed sitting in the far left corner, and a dresser that was empty on top all but a box. She head over to it. And opened it slightly. She knew she was being nosey. She saw these pictures. Not normal pictures. She could tell that it was Kannon in the first one; she went to the second and so forth each one of someone else. Sango, Miroku, Rin, Jaken, Sesshoumaru, and a couple she didn't know. But they weren't normal these pictures looked like they hand been transformed into something like demons. Must of been a bad a camera she thought flipping through them. Then she ran into one she didn't know... It looked like her but it wasn't, it couldn't have been. Wow she thought maybe that is why he is so nice to her cause she looks like someone he knows. The next pictured startled her so much she dropped all the pictures all over the floor. It was Inuyasha and Shippou. Her husband and her adopted son. NO this scared her now she felt like she was playing into a game. Was a picture of them doing here and why were these pictures so distorted. What was going on she had no clue. Then she heard the creek behind her, her heart raced she was scared. She wanted to go and hide by the bed and curl up in a ball but she didn't she turned around to see what was standing there. It was Sesshoumaru.

"What is going on here?" she said as the tears started flowing from her eyes. "Why do have a picture of my husband and my child, and why are these pictures different."

"There is so much you don't know Kagome, so much you don't remember." he said trying not to scare knowing that the difficult part had begun.

"What are you talking about, answer my question." she said in furry now more confused than ever.

"Inuyasha is my brother. I am Sesshoumaru No-Taishou, lord of the western lands, in my time." answered Sesshoumaru.

"What are you talking about; he sent you for me, didn't he? I am not going back ever do you hear me," she started screaming her mind was caving in. She thought she had gotten away from the torment for the torment to only find her once again.

"You have it all wrong. I am not here for my brother. I am here to take you home."

"I said I am not going back to him, what part of that didn't you understand."

"Not home to him Kagome, but to the home you don't remember. It is a long story just let us help you and explain it to you." he said not wanting her to take off. He had to explain. She needed to give him at least that chance.

"I don't remember forgetting anything. I have no blank memories in my life. There is nothing that you can tell me that I already don't know."

"Kagome remember those pictures. It is not the camera. Those pictures are of our true selves. We are demons. We are from the past. I know this may all be hard to understand but please let us try to help you understand." Sesshoumaru pleaded.

"I don't know what you are talking about, and why should I trust you."

"I am not here to hurt you Kagome."

"Sure, whatever, first your brother and now you."

She went to walk by him to walk out the door, she had enough, and she felt this man was just here to hurt her like his brother Inuyasha. When he once again, like he did at the Red Roof inn, gently grabbed her arm. "You know for a long time now you have felt like something was missing. I can show you what you are missing. I know what you have forgotten."

"You wish to tell me how I am supposed to trust you when you didn't even have enough faith in me to tell me your real name?" she glared at him.

"If I had told you that I was Sesshoumaru No-Taishou you would have realized I was Inuyasha's brother and you would not have given me the time to explain things, I needed you to see that there are people out there that are not as harsh as my brother. I needed you to learn to lean on me a little before I could tell you what you have been missing." he said gently squeezing her arm a little tighter letting her know that he was being totally honest.

"Well I would have like the opportunity to decide that for myself. If you know so much then you would have known that I have been lied to enough?" she said ripping her arm away and walking out the door. When she got to the bottom of the staircase there stood Kannon.

"Kagome I would advice to listen to what my son has to say. He means you no harm. He knows things that you need to know." Kannon spoke softly while standing in Kagome's way of exiting this house.

"Get out of my way; I am no longer involved in any of this. I wish to leave now."

"Fine Kagome but it won't be the way you wish it to be." with that Kannon pulled her powers to her finger tips and threw a purple swirling energy ball at Kagome. She instantaneously fell asleep and fell to the floor. Sesshoumaru was coming down the stairs behind her.

"Mother, what did you do? I had it under control?" said Sesshoumaru.

"Really looked like you did Sesshoumaru? She is only asleep long enough for us to get her to the feudal era where she will have no choice but to listen." Kannon's know it all attitude was getting on Sesshoumaru's nerves.

"I don't have time to argue with you right now, but I will tell you something she has been hurt enough and controlled enough. I wanted her to make her own decision." yelled Sesshoumaru at his mother. "I am not like my baka brother. I don't need to resort to such barbaric tactics to get that in which I desire." he growled.

"We couldn't let her leave; we don't have the time for her to make her own choice?" Kannon tried to explain.

"There is always time, and you are running thin on yours." he warned.

"I am sorry Sesshoumaru, I did what I felt was best." Kannon bowed her head in front of Sesshoumaru. A goddess giving in to her son, the lord of the west, it was an amazement.

"Well let's just take her to the feudal era and see what happens next." Sesshoumaru was wanting so much to be angry at his mother for hurting this creature that had already been tortured enough not only here in the modern time but in the feudal era that she doesn't even remember, but for now he must move on, and the truth be revealed.


	4. In The Feudal Era

**Chapter Four**

**In The Feudal Era**

Sesshoumaru picked up Kagome and walked into the back yard of the home where he and the tachi had once arrived from. He and the tachi walked through knowing full well that when Kagome woke up they would have a hand full on their hands but willing to take the chance. The bright light grew if anyone would have been noticing they would have seen the bright like star flashing behind this home. They went through what seemed to be an endless tunnel when they arrived on in the feudal era five hundred years prior to this day. Sesshoumaru laid Kagome down by a tree as he and most of the tachi went to gather some supplies and food for her awakening.

When Kagome awoke in the unfamiliar place called the feudal era she was more than confused and angry. She was distraught and pissed off.

Her eyes looked around her as the confusion and anger grew because she no longer knew anything around her. The last thing that she remembered was being hit with something and now she found herself here. What was she to do? She sat up and thought about the one person that she was sure to blame for the mess that she was in. If Inuyasha was as controlling as he had been then there was no reason for her to think that his brother would be any different. They didn't look all that much a like but that didn't mean that they weren't more alike in other areas.

"Its awake." said a female voice off to one side. The light in this area was too much, she didn't know where the voice was coming from but she needed to see the face, then maybe she would know who it was.

"I can't see you who are you?" she asked trying to adjust to the light in the area.

"I am Sango. You will have to learn to adjust to a lot of things. Though you don't realize it yet you are no longer human yourself." said the female voice that sounded closer to her

"What do you mean by that?" asked Kagome as she sat so that her back was against the trunk of the tree behind her

"You can't see yourself yet but you are in the form that you should be in." answered Sango

"You mean that I am in a demonic form now. I am not a demon."

"You are too Kagome you just don't remember how it was that you used to be, that is the reason that we are all here, to help you remember."

"By us all who are you talking about?"

"I mean Sesshoumaru, Kannon, Jaken, Rin, Miroku and myself; we are all here to help you remember."

"Remember what?"

"Your life before the one that you have just left."

"You know Inuyasha?"

"We all do, not that we would brag about it."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean that you did have a life before the one that you were just taken from. You belong here and though you weren't supposed to be there as long as you have been you are here now and will be told everything that has happened to you in the time that we have known you."

"Who am I?"

"That is the question that we are here to answer for you, well in a way."

"What does that mean?"

"There are things that you won't like about the life that you should have had but there are other things that once you get used to them will cause you great joy."

"I have a question of you."

"Ask it."

"Who hit me?"

"Kannon."

"Why?"

"You were leaving Sesshoumaru and we can't let you do that again."

"Again?"

"Yes again Kagome, you and Sesshoumaru have known each other for a _**long**_ time. You were friends before you were sent through the well."

"He doesn't seem like he was my friend. Are you sure that we were? I mean why would he send me with his brother if we were? Wouldn't he want to stay at my side to make sure that I was all right?"

"There are a lot of things that you don't know about Sesshoumaru. What you have to remember is that he would do anything that he could for you."

"Where is he now?" Kagome asked looking around her. Though the sun was still far too bright for her to see much she could tell that he wasn't in the area that they were in.

"Getting supplies for us." she answered matter of factly

"I want to see what I look like but I don't have a mirror." sighed Kagome

"There is a stream near here that is always clear and clean. You used to bathe in it while you were here the last time. I know that things will be hard on you for a while but I can only hope that you come to trust all of us."

"It will take time you know that. I don't know when this will all make sense but since I don't know how to get back to where I used to be I have to get used to this."

"It won't take you long it didn't the last time."

"You knew me then too?"

"I have known you for a while."

"Why did I leave the first time?"

"You have to ask Sesshoumaru about that. It was the one thing that I was told not to talk to you about."

"I don't understand why you can't tell me about that. What is there for him to hide from me? If we are friends then there should be no secrets between us."

"I hate to say this to you but Kagome you had them from me while you were here the last time. Granted I didn't know how big they were at the time but I understood once I found out what they were. He lives his private life in private so I don't know what it is that he doesn't want to tell you."

"You mean that there is a whole mess of things that I have to know to live here?"

"You will know them before we allow anything to happen to you. You should know that Sesshoumaru has waited a long time to see you again. The rest of us knew that you would come back but we had to wait until things were right to bring you back. Sesshoumaru told us that he had found you and the time scale got pushed up as fast as we could do it. We wanted you in our lives like you were before. We have all missed you Kagome but I don't think that anyone missed you more than he did."

"What kind of demon are you?" asked Kagome as she avoided what she was sure would be a messy conversation.

"I am a cat demon I am agile and kind hearted but can get mean if provoked. Don't you wish to know what kind of demon you are?" Sango questioned.

"I am not so sure that I really want to know..."

"That is understandable if you don't, but in all honesty it might make you understand things better."

"Ok, I don't know why I am asking this but what kind of demon would you say that I am?" Kagome snickered still unbelieving the whole situation.

"You are now a full blooded dog demon miko priestess you use to just be a miko but things were slightly so to speak changed before you left."

"How were they changed? What does all of this mean?"

"In time you will have the answer to your questions for the questions that you have asked are not my business."

"Then who's business is it?" she retorted.

"Sesshoum…"  
By the time that she was about to get out his name he walked into the clearing where they were. "Oh let me guess him," Kagome pointed to Sesshoumaru.

"Yes!"

"Figures, all lies…"

"I wish to return back to my miserable life and to leave this devastating nightmare behind." Kagome screeched through her troubled tears.

"Go back to what? That thing that was called your life. Come on you have nothing to loose here." Sesshoumaru responded.

"I have my son, he hasn't lied to me."

At that time Shippou her son came into the clearing in his demon state. The little firry fox walked up to his mother "I am sorry, I was sworn to secrecy, but I am still your son and I am still right here by your side."

Kagome stood up and look at everyone that had showed up around her "Get away from me, all of you, this isn't real!" With that she took off like a dart through the forest having no clue where she was going or what she was going to do she just knew that she had to get away. The words of her son had hurt her too much for he too had not been honest. She ran until she ran through a bunch of trees and fell into a stream. When she arose out of the water she looked down into the shiny water, "aahhhh…" she screamed, the site of her wasn't normal she felt the blood rush up to her head and she backed up and ended up fainting half out of the water.

Sesshoumaru, further away than one should normally be able to hear, heard the shriek of Kagome's voice and immediately responded toward her direction, he had a feeling he knew where she was a why she screamed. He wanted so badly just to console her and comfort her and tell her what the past was like and what it was that she left behind but the words didn't come out right was it because of the pain that he felt even though it was beyond her control she did leave him and once again make his heart go cold. What was it that made him even want to care about her again, but none the less he had to run to her rescue. He could only think of the excuse that it wasn't for his sake it was for their child's. Something else that must be revealed with time.

When he arrived at the stream he saw Kagome laying on the side of the river half in and half out she was soaked from head to toe. He knew he needed to get her to a dry warm place. He placed one hand under her pelt by her neck and the other under her knees to lift her in the air, her pelt twitched to his touch and wrapped itself around his. It was as if the pelt never forgot who its mate was. He dashed toward his mansion he would send Jaken for the others later right now all that mattered was Kagome and getting her there safely.


	5. Jaken's Crucifixion

**Chapter Five**

**Jaken's crucifixion**

As fast as Sesshoumaru could run they reached his mansion in no time at all, he went through the door and had just reached the room that he had prepared for her previously when a seven year old walked through the door that looked more 14 than seven, "Dad, let me see my mother!"

"Segome, listen your mother doesn't know yet she is taking all of this hard, you must leave I will come and explain everything to you soon. You will see her soon I promise."

"But father, I have waited for the past five years how can you expect me to just leave and wait longer. I can explain things to her a little bit now too; I am no longer that infant you used to carry."

"Leave!!!" His voice became rough for the first time he lost his temper. Segome needed to leave this would just throw Kagome further out of his reach. With that she took off running crying loudly and cursing her father.

"I am sorry," Sesshoumaru whispered to himself. He bowed his head in front of Kagome, his mind so unsettled about everything when he realized he better get some of her clothes to put on her he then yelled "Jaken!"

The little green imp looking creature quickly came to his master's call. "Yes master?"

"I need you to hurry and tell the others to come here and bring her things I must change her as soon as possible and I wish to put something on her that will keep her somewhat calm."

"You want me to bring that nasty tachi here again. Come on."

"I don't have time to mess with you right now Jaken, do as I request or I will make it into a threatening demand."

"Fuck, I thought I got rid of all this turmoil." Jaken whispered turning around.

"What do you mean by that?" questioned Sesshoumaru as he turned to look at Jaken.

"Nothing sir,"

"We will see about that later. Now go!" he raised a threatening eyebrow. He then took a rock out from his pocket that he had picked up earlier and hit Jaken in the back of the head with it as Jaken had turned to walk away. "There, that is where they are, now hurry."

"That was uncalled for sir,"

Sesshoumaru stood up in full position "You dare to speak to me, your lord and master, with that tone? Do you wish to learn how to fly I know a quicker way to get you there?"

"NO master, my apologies, the stress at this point is overwhelming, excuse me sir."

"Your stress, you have done nothing but sit here on your lazy ass and complain like a little bitch, I suggest you move very quickly before I show you what kind of stress I am under."

"I am going, I am going sorry my lord." with that Jaken existed the room to go tell the others.

Sesshoumaru knew that it would take sometime for the others to arrive with her things so he went and retrieved some towels so he could get the wet clothes removed and to dry her. (no problem) he thought as he start to undo the blouse that she still had on from the modern era as he undid the buttons he felt the tingling sensation going through his body as his pelt began to twitch "Behave" he thought to himself. But as the blouse fell around her wet perky nipple to her breast he felt his heart start to pound, for so long he had missed her and had not been able to taste her how nice it would be to taste her now, but yet he had to remember that Kagome wasn't Kagome, she had forgotten all about him, and knew nothing of their past relations. Her pelt once again started to twirl with his own, as if it needed him in that same way. He turned to the pelts and said "patients we will have our time again." But his sword below was not being so patient. He was able to remove her shirt but when he got to the pants he had to sit back on his knees to take some breaths for images were flooding his head. His inner demon kept screaming at him (mine!) the fight within him to remain calm in this somewhat devastating situation continued as he removed her pants. He took the towel and started to dry here face and arms trying everything to remain away from what he so desperately desired. When he was done he looked at her peaceful face remembering everything from the past, her hair blowing in the wind, the night that they mated, the day that she returned his arm and the day that Segome was born, he was remembering her going through the garden, and him chasing her through the mansion and always having her land in the bed. Oh what memories he had that he so wished she could only remember.

At the moment of him reminiscing Segome walked into the room. "Dad, what on earth do you think that you are doing? This is not right you said yourself that she doesn't remember, you are taking advantage of her."

"You are looking at this all wrong. I was just trying to dry her off for her clothes and was sitting here thinking."

"Yeah right dad."

"Seriously,"

At that moment Sango came in upon the request of Jaken to bring Sesshoumaru her things. "What is going on? What is this perverted stuff going on. You taking advantage of your mate in front of your child, you are sick." she went up to smack him when he held up his hand and said "This is not what you think it is... I was just trying to dry her so I can put some clothes on her when you returned and then... Wait a minute why am I explaining myself to you... There is nothing to explain. Give me those."

He reached and grabbed the clothes from Sango and motioned for them to leave. Sango turned around "You just wait until she remembers I will tell her what I caught you doing."

He raised an eyebrow at her "Really, enlighten me on something what do you mean get her memory back."

"There is a way to reverse the curse, but you would have to ask Jaken, you know, knowing that he had something to do with it in the first place."

"Excuse me, he did not."

"Well, you will see."

"No you tell me now."

"It is none of my business that is all I can say." Sango started to retreat to the door when Sesshoumaru jumped and placed his hand on the door jam.

"I ask a question I expect an answer."

"I am sorry, you did not state a question, and you stated that he did not. How is that a question?"

"Tell me what you know. I am your lord remember that."

"Well lord, first please cover your mate with decency and then we can discuss this. I will be in the foyer."

"Well I don't appreciate someone telling me what to do but you are right, you better be there."

Sesshoumaru picked Kagome's things back up off the floor and started to go through her things in the bottom of the bad he found a orange fur pelt that he was almost certain belonged to a certain fox. Now why would Kagome? Sesshoumaru thought. He had not quite got all the answers of what exactly went on and why Shippou sworn his self to secrecy but he had a feeling that the pelt would come in handy later. He could tell that someone had put a hiding spell on it was it Kagome? Inuyasha? With questions still running through his mind he went and put the pelt in the bottom chore of his dresser. He fetch her a descent outfit out of her clothes not something that he would choose to have her wear, she belonged in a kimono of his colors, but now was still not the right time. So he put the clothes on very carefully he didn't want to disturb her, she needed the rest.

He went downstairs into the foyer still contemplating on what all this secret was about, and getting more and more angrier over the fact of the possibility of Jaken having something to do with all of this. When he walked into the foyer, there stood Shippou and Sango.

"Now what is going on? No more games." Sesshoumaru walked in so angrily that Shippou hid behind Sango.

"First of all anger towards us is not appropriate, we have had nothing to do with it."

"I have yet to show my anger to you, my anger is elsewhere and I need you to tell me everything you know. Why is the kitsune here?"

"Lord, I am the one with the knowledge of why all of this has happened; I am the one who told Sango everything."

"You did not tell me this at the well for what reason."

"The well?" Sango asked.

"Yes, that is how he knew how to find Kagome; I met him at the well to tell him where she was. I didn't tell you everything for reasons of my own."

"They better be good reasons."

"Inuyasha has my father's pelt and if I disclose any information he will burn it that is my only family heirloom."

"What if I told you that I could give you back that pelt, if you help me in this matter?"

"You promise; that is all I have?"

"I promise. Now tell me."

"Inuyasha and Jaken planned all of this; Jaken didn't want Kagome around because he still felt she was a stupid ningen even though you two mated, he didn't like her. And Inuyasha says that you have everything he has ever wanted so he wanted to take something that you cherished the most."

"I see and how did this go about?"

"Inuyasha made the mind erasing poison, and Jaken gave it to her in the drink. When she went to sleep that night, remember Jaken coming in a telling you there was an emergency in the land, a fight. Well it was a fight that Inuyasha started to get you away from her. When you were out saving the land so to speak Jaken let Inuyasha in and with her and the jewel he went through the well and gave her false memories that she was his."

"So why did you go along, how?"

"He forced me to go because I found out what the two had done; he took my pelt and said that if I told he would destroy it, so I have never said a word."

"Jaken, my life servant, Inuyasha my brother, how dare they betray me," the anger grew stronger and stronger within him. He kept trying to fight the demon but it would not settle. "Jaken!!"

"Wait my pelt first please; if you tell him and he goes and tell Inuyasha then I will loose it forever."

"I made a promise kitsune, that I will not break, but this is getting dealt with now, and where he is going he isn't going to be talking."  
"Jaken come here now!"

"Wait Sesshoum…"

Before Sango could get any further with Sesshoumaru Jaken walked through the door, as soon as he came in Sesshoumaru was gone he pounced right on Jaken and started hitting him and kicking him "My lord, what did I do? I have done nothing wrong, stop your killing me."

"Exactly my intentions," Sesshoumaru said pulling out his dagger and stabbing Jaken right in the stomach. After he stabbed him he picked up the carcass and tossed him into the wall. Jaken was dead, and Sesshoumaru's anger was still building. He had to calm down he had to get away he turn to exit the room when Sango once again piped up "Sesshoumaru you shouldn't of done that."

"Why, you care about the imp that much?" he said coldly.

"No, but he is the only one that can bring back Kagome's memory since he is the one that technically took it away. That is what I was trying to tell you."

"Like hell I am bringing him back, he caused me this suffering, I will not."

"Then you must make new memories for Kagome for she will never remember the past, and that is if she even believes you." Shippou spoke very sheepishly.

"NO!" Sesshoumaru was loosing his mind without Kagome, how could he live without the memories that they had together, she needed those memories but why bring back the poor servant who had interrupted his life. She brought back his heart without her memories his heart would no longer be intact. He didn't really want to go back to his cold life but was that what he was supposed to do? Should he just forget about all the times with her and forget the beginning of the end or should he bring back this being that had no heart for him and took away the only thing that ever gave him satisfaction. These questions kept roaming through his head he couldn't help but to wonder the differences of life then and now. What would it of really mattered? He was use to being cold; could he just stay that way for eternity? His child was grown, did he really need something more to protect? He wasn't sure he wanted anything. He realized he couldn't even protect his mate from his own life long servant. All of a sudden his baser half came into his logical side "You couldn't protect her then but you can save her now do you wish to make the same mistake twice, give me back my mate."

"You are right." Sesshoumaru spoke to himself but said it a little too loud.

"Right about what?" Sango looked at him like he was crazy.

"Nothing…" He pulled Tenseiga out of his obi and waved the sword over Jaken's dead mangled body. You saw the swirls of light come from the healing sword and suddenly Jaken began to move. He slowly rose.

"I sorry master, sorry." He kept repeating as he backed himself right up into a corner.

Sesshoumaru walked up tauntingly towards Jaken every inch of his body portraying a threat to the living creature that was cowering in the corner. He picked him up with one hand and held out his other as he cracked his knuckles and the poison came to the surface "Now explain yourself servant."

"Explain wha…" before he could get out the rest of the word Sesshoumaru tightened his grip around his neck."

"Act clueless and you will pay much harsher consequences that not even death can escape."

"I am sorry my lord, I didn't mean to speak of the tachi that way, I am sorry, pleeaaase let go."

"That is not what I am referring to; for they can take care of themselves what I want to know is something that you have been hiding from me."

"Wha...wha...what could you possibly be looking for, I have done nothing wrong, well there was that time that I stuck Rin in the closet but she..shee..." Jaken choked as Sesshoumaru's grip tightened turning his green face to purple and red.

"Sesshoumaru!! Jaken you know what he speaks of… Kagome?"

With the enlightenment of Sango telling Jaken what Sesshoumaru was looking for he loosened his grip so Jaken could speak.

(Cough cough) "My lord it isn't what you think, it was all Inuyasha, I swear."

"How dare you lie to me, do you think me foolish, you were apart of it and I suggest you explain yourself or I will let Segome use you as a target for life. As of right now your only punishment will be waiting on the tachi for the rest of your worthless life."

"I get to do what? OH thank you dad. I have been waiting for this moment ever since I found out." Segome walked into the foyer excited at her father's threat.

"What are you doing here? And what do you mean found out." Sesshoumaru asked Segome still holding on to Jaken.

"I was just listening to all the commotion father you know how well I love to hear Jaken scream. I knew that he had something to do with all this I over heard him and uncle Inuyasha talking but I could get everything they said. All I heard was Kagome and potion."

"Why didn't you say something to me before?"

"I didn't think you believe me father. I am sorry."

"So Jaken... what is your choice?" Sesshoumaru now glaring at the red eyes peering at him.

"I still have no clue of what you are speaking of."

"All right I get a target, I get a target." Giggled Segome.

"All right, all right I will tell you. Inuyasha and I took Kagome's memories, I didn't feel that she was worthy of such a lord like yourself master, we made a potion and I gave it to her sucking her memories in a black diamond. I was just looking out for you all powerful one."

"Looking out for me. She was and is my mate. I want her returned to me."

"I…I…I…. can't, the memories are stuck in the black diamond, master… please don't kill me again."

"Where is this black diamond?"

"Right here, please don't kill me." he said reaching for the necklace around his neck that hung in his shirt.

Sesshoumaru retracted his poison and grabbed the necklace from around Jaken's neck breaking the chain, "that is all I require of you, traitor, here Segome go have your fun."

"But sir... I told you. I told you all." Jaken whimpered.

"Too late, unless there is something that you can do to make this as if it never happened, but you can't turn back time." He handed Jaken to Segome as he turned to Sango and Shippou.

"But, I can help you give them back, I know who can help you." Jaken spoke in a last ditch ever to save his ass.

"So tell me then…"

"But dad, mine…" whined Segome.

"You will see Segome, patients."

She let go of the green imp as he walked up to Sesshoumaru, "only her true mate can release those memories back to her."

"I am her mate, why are you still toying with me?"

"Well then, if you are her true mate and she is truly yours, then you will have no more issues." Smiled Jaken.

"I have heard enough, Segome take him from my sight, and be sure to torture him over and over." He turned away.

"But sir... you said..." Segome grabbed Jaken and dragged him out of the room. She didn't want to wait any longer.

Sesshoumaru not even dismissing himself from the room walked away from the two standing there. He went upstairs with the necklace went into the room where Kagome laid and held the diamond over her. He was puzzled what was it, why wasn't it working. What was he suppose to, for the first time he was baffled. Angrily he shoved the diamond into his pocket and walked out of the room, he had to get away to go think. Was he not her mate? Was this all a mistake, was Jaken right of her deserving him or did he not deserve her. He went to the spring; it was the only place of peace he could find.

"_Why question my heart, I am her mate to that there is no question."_

"If I was her mate then why didn't it work? Why didn't her memories go to her?"

"_For there is doubt." _The baser half plainly stated.

"Who are you speaking to my son?" Kannon came into the area.

"No one, I was just thinking."

"I see I was walking along when I felt your pain it is all around here, what is it that troubles you?"

"Nothing." He looked away.

"Aw, must be the strong one right, don't think I would understand or you think I would think my own son to be weak." Kannon knew there was something wrong and knew that he liked to be strong and not lean on anyone.

"Nothing I can't control mother, nothing I can't figure out."

"I see, well you are out here away from everyone where are there?"

"They are at the castle, Kagome fell into this spring and I had to take her somewhere dry I sent Jaken for the rest of the group, you must not have been there then. That impeccable traitor."

"Why the anger towards Jaken, my son?" Kannon was confused.

"HE was involved, he took Kagome away from me, he helped erase her memory, and he put them into this." He showed Kannon the black diamond as he pulled it out of his pocket.

"Aw, the test to a true mate."

"You know what this is, mother?"

"Yes it can hold memories, spirits, and hearts until such time that a true mate can release its inner withholdings."

"I am her mate mother, but it didn't work." Sesshoumaru showed discouragement in his voice.

"In time my son you will figure it out, maybe everything is wrong, maybe not, only you can figure it out but don't give up on her. She is worth the fight." Kannon knew the he had to be Kagome's mate or they would not have been able to make Segome, but he had to figure it out for himself, for doubt can not be relieved by being told.

He rose up "Come mother, we must be getting back to the others." They headed back to the castle. When they arrived everyone had already found a spot to rest Shippou was with Rin, separate beds of course, in the same room. Sango and Miroku were in the foyer on a pallet they had made on the floor, and Segome was in her room laying on Jaken as if he was her pillow she had him tied up. Now that was torture. "Mother, I am going to retreat, there is another room down the hall if you so wish to stay the night?"

"That is alright son; I have a home to go to. I will see you soon. Take care of her, if you need me you know where I will be." She left as quickly as she had appeared to him at the spring he went upstairs to where Kagome was and sat in a rocker next to her still thinking of what he could be doing wrong, drifting off to sleep. He was bent over with his head beside hers.


	6. Segome Gets To Know Her Mother

Chapter Six

Segome gets to know he mother

Segome was outside shooting arrows at Jaken and making him jump through hoops, she was always aiming for his arms or legs, her father wasn't out there to bring him back to life and she wished to torture him. She really hated him. Inside the castle Sango and Rin were in the kitchen making breakfast for the tachi, they had not eaten since the dinner in the modern era. Miroku and Shippou were helping by setting the table, they were hungry but they didn't know whether they should disturb the master bedroom

When Kagome awoke she looked over to see Sesshoumaru beside her, having a flash back of Inuyasha she screamed and hopped up and ran crying in the corner of the room. She was shaking feverishly.

Sesshoumaru hearing Kagome scream and feeling her move awoke. He move to her quickly they closer he came he watched her shake in the corner. "Kagome, please, it is ok. No one is going to hurt you."

"Stay away from me. You know nothing. Leave me alone." She sobbed tears of fright.

At that time Sango and Rin ran into the room hearing her scream, "What is going on?" Sango questioned.

"She is scared. See if you can't calm her, I will be downstairs." Sesshoumaru walked out of the room.

Rin, being the youngest and less harmful, decided she should be the one to calm her "Sango, let me calm mom please, let me try?"

"I will be right outside the door." Sango understood that Rin needed that time with her she may not have been her flesh but she was her daughter and she knew her better than Segome.

"mo…Kagome? It is me Rin, it is ok. I promise. Please don't be scared."

"Where am I? Why am I here?"

"Dad lives here, Sesshoumaru, It will be ok. We all are here; we are here to help you." Rin placed her shaking hand on Kagome shaking shoulder. She was nervous of Kagome getting mad.

"I just still don't understand all of this; I don't mean to hurt you."

"Kagome, please you are my mom, I know you don't remember but you are just like you are to Shippou, you have me and you have Segome. We love you and we need you, I know you don't believe all of this and I know I can't make you but know we don't want to hurt you."

"I know Shippou, I met you, who is Segome?" Kagome looked confused.

"I shouldn't be the one telling you this; it just might freak you more. I don't want you to run away."

"I won't, I promise, not from you."

"She is daddy and your daughter."

"Daddy?"

"Sesshoumaru."

"Aw, yea ok."

"See, I knew you wouldn't believe me."

"I am sorry; you have to understand this is all so confusing."

"Just calm down, come down for breakfast with us, no one wants to hurt you, Sango is right outside if you would like her?"

"It is ok, I will be down in a little bit, I would like some time alone."

"Ok, I sorry mom I mean Kagome. I will see you down there." With that Rin walked out the door and her and Sango walked down into the dinning area to wait for breakfast.

Kagome looked at her stuff on the floor and then turned and looked in the mirror. Her short black hair was now longer down to the back of her knees, she noticed that her original brown eyes were now sapphire blue, she looked down at her hands and noticed that her fingers now contained long sharp black claws, she had a black and dark blue jagged stripe on her wrists. She couldn't get over the way that her cheekbones glowed because of the silver stripes that ran down both sides. She noticed that she didn't have the same clothes on that she did before she looked at her things and realized her stuff had been rummaged through. Just like them to go nosing through her stuff she thought, she sat on the bed still stunned about her appearance and started pondering through the events that had happened over the last day. She looked at her bag once again and picked it up she realizes something is missing. She picks out each item as to try and remember what all she had. Then she realized that the furry thing that she had taken that Inuyasha had for there entirety was missing. She had taken it from him out of spite how dare Sesshoumaru take it and give it back. That was all she could think of that he took it to give it back to his stupid brother.

In outrage she ran out of the room, she bypassed the dining area. She didn't know exactly where she was at or how to get about, all she knew was she was going to find a way out. When she went by the dining room Miroku turned around and hollered at her to stop, thinking she didn't know where she was going but she kept running until she ran right out the front door. She ran through the yard and out the gate when she finally slowed down to where she could take a breath of the fresh air.

Segome who was outside torturing Jaken saw her mother run by, she thought maybe she was just scared so she configured a way to be able to talk with her, maybe she could gain her trust. She went up to the door where her father stood "father, let me try to go talk to her, maybe I can gain her trust, after all I am her daughter, flesh and blood, maybe she will feel a connection to me."

"Segome, I don't want you to get hurt. Emotionally or physically."

"I won't, I have my guards up, that is something you taught me well father, right?"

"I see, yes maybe you are right, so what do you want from me?" Sesshoumaru was wounded at his daughter's words. He had tried to be kind to her and show her the love of a father. He was cold for so long until he met Kagome, and then she was gone he didn't know how to react for love was not something he had many times in his life.

"Just to understand that I do love you dad, but I want to go after her."

"Keep in touch; you know how, you must let me know that the both of you are all right."

"Yes father." With that she walked away from her dad and her security that she had at the castle but she knew the only way to get her mother to trust her was one on one. She already knew how to use her powers more than Kagome; her mother didn't know how to use any of hers. She focused herself to go ahead of her mother without her mother's knowledge. She sat down by a near by bush and pretended to cry.

Kagome continued to walk through the wood not caring about anything; all she really wanted to do at the moment was to die. She didn't feel that she had anything left to live for when she came around a tree, down by a bush she noticed a young woman crying.

"Hello,"

"I am sorry, I am fine." Segome was a good actor.

Kagome wiped her own tears from her own eyes. For once she felt like she was needed by someone other than those people. "Well I know you are not fine, fore you are crying, and you said you were fine."

"What do you care?" Segome responded.

"Well if it makes you feel any better, I have been taken from everything I have ever known, into this world that I don't with this body. I feel like I am in a dream. So come on, nothing can be as bad as what I am going through."

"My mother doesn't know me for me."

"Aw, teenage years, huh, never enough appreciation, never enough emotion. I went through that at one point in time. I am sure your mother loves you. Be happy that you have her." Kagome didn't even catch that this was her daughter.

"So, why are you out here all alone?" Segome knew that she had her attention now, which was more than what they had earlier.

"I don't know really, and I don't think that you would understand if I told you, hell I don't even understand. I am so tired of trying to figure it out. If it isn't one thing it is another. Those fucking NoTaishou's are worthless, mind playing, son of a bitches. Sorry you are the one upset, I should not be rambling."

"LORD Sesshoumaru, you hate him?"

"Well if that is what they call him, yes, he and his brother are worthless."

"Hmm, who was his brother?"

"Inuyasha," Kagome hated even thinking of that name.

"Yes he is a baka." Segome giggled.

"Baka? Idiot. How do I know what that means." She kept thinking she must have heard it from somewhere but she knew what it meant and that told her maybe there was something that she didn't know about her past. "So what is your name?"

"Umm, I don't think it is a good idea that I tell you."

"Ok well mine is Kagome Higurashi, and I know you probably don't trust me but I don't trust anyone either, so maybe we could help each other." Kagome was still unsure of the situation but knew that she didn't know her way around or her way home, she needed someone who knew something to help her find her way out.

"OK, what do you need help with?"

"Well I would really like to find a way home; if you help me I will do what I can to help you understand your mother, and maybe a payment."

"Well payment is not something that I require but understanding would be nice." Segome just wanted to love her mother and be around her no matter what that meant that she had to do. "Before we start our journey to find this mystic place we should go were your clothes is and get your things, where may that be?"

"I don't have any; I don't know where they are."

"I know where to get some if you trust me, I can take you to the nearby village to the tailor there and we can look."

"Ok, then maybe we can find something to eat." She knew that she didn't have any money for anything but she could just hope that it worked out she really didn't want to go back to the palace.

They headed through the woods when they soon came to a village. Segome led Kagome up to a store that had the word tailor engraved on a wooden sign outside the door. Kagome was a little cautious when entering but Segome in a way led her through the door. When they walked in the shop Segome gave the tailor a look that told him she needed to speak with him.

"Well se…"

"HI, haven't seen you in a while, you remember that shirt I was looking for last time I was here, would you mind taking me back and looking to see if you have it in yet?"

"Oh, yes right this way ma'am."

"I will be right back, go ahead and look around."

"Ok."

With that the tailor and Segome went into the back of the store while Kagome started scarcely prowling through the store.

"Hey Goldore, you know who that is out there right?"

"Yes, it is Kagome, what is all the secrecy about?"

"Listen she doesn't know who she is, but you know who I am. I request that you give her whatever she desires, you know that I am good for it."

"Yes lady Segome, anything else that you require?"

"You must not speak my name while in her presence she must not know who is getting these clothes or that I am her daughter."

"I understand. What shall I call you then?"

"Nothing."

They walked back into the main part of the store Segome went up to Kagome "they still don't have the shirt I am looking for have you found anything of your likings? I think this would look nice on you." Segome spoke as she picked up one of the most expensive kimono's there."

"I don't have any money, we should just leave." Kagome was embarrassed of being broke.

"With the clothing that you have on, you should take her up on her offer Kagome." The tailor spoke up.

"But I have no money, how am I to pay."

"Don't worry about it; think about it as a gift."

"I have found nothing to be a gift in this world."

"I owe her a shirt that I have not been able to provide for her yet so to make up for it anything in this store is at your disposal on me." the tailor said winking at Segome.

Kagome took the Kimono and a couple of other clothes. She thanked the tailor and they started to head for the door. There were about five feet from the door when a gentleman came in and looked straight at Segome, "where is lord Sesshoumaru, there is a major fight we need him."

"Why would he be in here, go look elsewhere."

"But there is a fight outside, who is going to deal with it?"

"Well look there he is now, it looks like he is the one fighting." The tailor pointed out the window.

Segome and Kagome looked out the window to see that not only was Sesshoumaru really out there but he was fighting Inuyasha. "What is he doing here." Kagome spoke so soft that only Segome could hear her.

"Fighting, I guess."

"There has to be another way out of here?" Kagome was starting to coward she didn't want to be seen.

"Tailor do you have another exit?" asked Segome.

"No there isn't but I can give you a place to stay until such a time that is safe for you to leave. I have food and a place for sleep if needed."

"Thank you, Kagome, why don't you go ahead with Goldore and I will be back shortly."

"Why?"

"Trust me."

Kagome went back with the tailor into the other room that he called home. The gentleman spoke up "Why aren't you out there Segome? What is going on here?"

"None of your business, and I suggest you leave."

"Yes my lady, sorry if I offended you."

"Be quite and go." Segome didn't want him calling her lady anymore just in case Kagome decided to return.

Segome walked outside where her father and Inuyasha were fighting. "Hey, hey, hey, do you really have to be fighting right here at this time?" she eyed her father.

"Shut up you little bitch." Inuyasha yelled.

"How dare you even try to offend her in that way, why don't you tell her what you are doing here hanyou?"

"I have come for my wife; I know you have taken her from me."

"Oh shut up hanyou, Kagome is not yours and never will be she is ours. But father you must take this elsewhere for reasons that are closer than you realize."

"What do you mean Segome? She is here isn't she?" asked Inuyasha.

"No she isn't, and where she is, is none of your concern, Jaku."

Inuyasha came close to Segome as if to smack her, it didn't matter to him he had gotten use to treating people like shit.

Sesshoumaru stepped up between them and grabbed Inuyasha's arm as he chucked him through the air; he yelled "You will not dishonor my child like you have my mate for so long."

He then took off after him and was constantly throwing Inuyasha to get the fight to happen elsewhere.

FLASHBACK

WHILE SEGOME AND Kagome WERE ON THEIR WAY TO THE TAILOR.

Sesshoumaru watched as his daughter took off after her mother. While eating breakfast with the others of the group he felt a presence that he knew should not have been there. He quickly rose from the table growling and raced for the door.

"What are you doing my lord?" asked Miroku.

"He is here, and pissed." Sesshoumaru had barely gotten out the words before the others heard the slamming of the mansion door as Inuyasha had stepped in.

"How dare you think that you may enter my home without my permission, hanyou?" Sesshoumaru was growling and shaking with anger.

"Well it is our fathers originally, I have just as much say so in it as you do, big brother."

"Our father left this to me, he left you the shit you call brains."

"Yes something that you lack."

"What is your business here?" Sesshoumaru's eyes were turning red.

"You have taken something that is mine."

"Yours my ass, she was mine first and is mine even now." Sesshoumaru stated.

"How does it feel to know that the only reason she is here is because she is all washed up."

"She is here because you are an asshole and couldn't even satisfy her. But look where she came back to if that tells you where she really wants to be."

"Yea, uh Sesshoumaru, where is she?"

"Out."

"Oh you going to make me go find her huh, that might not be a pretty ending."

"You lay one hand on her, you are dead hanyou."

"We will see Sesshoumaru." Before anyone else moved he went back out the door he had just entered looking for Kagome.

Sesshoumaru took off after Inuyasha he knew that he had to protect Kagome, and he would kill him over and over if he had too.

END OF FLASHBACK

Segome walked back into the tailor and into the home where Kagome currently sat eating what we call brunch. She had saved some for Segome which was nice.

Kagome had changed her clothes while Segome was dealing with her father and Inuyasha. She put on the kimono that Segome had picked out. She was still kind of frightened after seeing Inuyasha. She couldn't get over what he was doing there.

"Are you ready Kagome?"

"I am not sure, are they gone, where did you go?"

"It is fascinating to watch lord Sesshoumaru fight, you wouldn't believe what they were fighting over." Segome said knowing full well that it would peak Kagome's interest.

"What were they fighting over?"

"Well Inuyasha claimed that some woman named Kagome, like you, was his wife who left him, and Sesshoumaru was saying that she wasn't his that she was his mate."

"Have you ever known Sesshoumaru to have a mate?"

"There was a rumor that he was mated and they had a kid but she left him for his brother. Hard telling, you know how rumors go around, never know what to believe. Anyway yes they are gone."

"I see. I am ready to go home now."

"Well let's go see if we can't figure out where that might be."

With that they left the tailors home, when they reached the shops door Kagome stood for a moment, (((she sees Sesshoumaru standing on the outside of the shop next to a large green two headed dragon holding a brown wrapped package in his hands.))) where did that vision come from she questioned herself. Why had she seen what she just seen? She shook her head a little confused on what just happened.

"Are you ok Kagome?" Segome noticed that Kagome had spaced out and stopped moving, it concerned her for a second.

"I just thought I saw something; that is all. It was nothing."

"Are you sure, you look a little lost?"

"I am alright. Let us go." With that Kagome swallowed what hesitation she had and walked out of the store. They continued their way to the forest and started wondering aimlessly through it. Kagome had no clue where they were going but felt like she was going in circles, Segome knew how to get her back but had no intentions of telling her how. Later on that evening they decided to make camp. Where they got a fire going to keep warm, ate some berries, and decided to rest for the night.

At some point through out the night a guy named Fufu decided to come and kidnap Kagome, he knew that Kagome was very valuable to Sesshoumaru and that he could finally get the land that he required. He didn't know who Segome was for she had gotten older than he remember or he would have taken her too. He called the demons to attack and found that Kagome didn't know about her powers and was pretty well useless. The demons knocked down Segome and held her down while he took off with Kagome. Kagome being half asleep and half awake and in shock could only remember hearing the woman she had met hollering mother! She soon lost consciousness from the hold of Fufu.

Segome awoke later seeing that it wasn't a dream and her mother was gone, she knew that she had to go get her father. She had done it again, lost her mother. How could she of let them get her. Why didn't they take her, she was just as important. All she could do was pray they didn't kill her. She was just getting to know her.

flashback

WHILE THEY WERE TRAVELING

Sesshoumaru continued to follow Inuyasha and beat up on him along the way until later on that evening when Inuyasha became tired.

"Alright, Enough, I am tired we need to just figure this out stop kicking my ass." Inuyasha moaned

"Well if you want to work this out then for now you must stay in my dungeon."

"Hell no, and be with the ones that you torture."

"Well either that or I can go on like this for months. Then again there is another option, I could just kill you and still put you in the dungeon and bring you back at my leisure. I will do all it takes to protect her and that includes not trusting you."

"Come on brother, what you want with a washed up miko."

"A washed up miko she may have been to you, but the sad part is you are still half blood and she is full demon. That is not the only reason I want her and will have her, she is my mate."

"What if I promise to back off?"

"How many times in the modern era did you promise to never hit her again and turn around and do it, you think that I would trust a pathetic wife beater like you."

"Give me the chance that I need to prove this to you?"

"Well for now, like I said you shall stay in my dungeon and just thank the gods that you are getting away with your life." Sesshoumaru drew his blade in a threatening manner.

"Ok, fine."

With Sesshoumaru following Inuyasha they returned to the castle, where he and Miroku put the hanyou in the dungeon and retreated for some much needed rest.

Sesshoumaru couldn't rest though he kept thinking about Kagome, wondering if she was ok. He finally crashed in the foyer dreaming of her sweet touch.

END OF FLASHBACK


	7. Brothers and a Hint

CHAPTER SEVEN

With Segome

She got up and ran like the wind to the palace she had to find Sesshoumaru so he could save her mother. She busted through the mansion door and ran upstairs to the master bedroom thinking that is where Sesshoumaru would have been all the while hollering "dad, dad,". When she reached the master bedroom she ran inside to find it empty, not him too she thought. She felt alone, she thought he left her too. She fell to her knees on the floor and started crying not only in physical pain but emotional as well. Moments later in her distress she could hear the heartbeat of her father, Sesshoumaru. She jumped up and ran of the room running into Sesshoumaru almost knocking him over; he had heard her call earlier.

"Daddy, daddy," she sobbed in his shirt.

"Segome, we don't get like this remember." He said pulling her away from his chest.

"But I need you dad, please hold me, don't do this." At the request of his daughters pain and seeing the blood coming from her he pulled her back in.

"I am sorry Segome, so much has gone on, and it isn't you. What has happened? Why are you hurt?"

"They beat me up, they took her."

"Who?"

"You know the guy that wanted more land from you, for his own purposes?"

"Oh, you couldn't handle him?"

"He wasn't the one; he had demons attack me 6 of them. They held me down and kicked me and hurt me, I screamed for her father, I tried but there was too many. I have failed her again. Now she is gone."

"No you didn't Segome, I did."

"Father, can you save her please. I want my mother?"

"I will try, don't blame yourself for this I should of went after her, I should have known she wouldn't remember her power. But I was so hur…" Sesshoumaru suddenly became silent, he had realized that her not being there didn't only anger him, it hurt him.

"Father….?"

"Segome go heal, have Sango help you, I will return."

The group gathered around at that time.

"Sango take care of her, and wait for my return." he sent Segome with Sango.

"Miroku please take care of the children a little while longer, if you want make Jaken they jumping bag. And wait for my return."

"Yes my lord, are you sure you don't need any help?" Miroku questioned.

"When it comes to my mate, my inner demon is all the back up I need." Sesshoumaru growled.

With the rest of the group already moving to do with what they were suppose to do for the morning Sesshoumaru headed out to go find Fufu. He showed up at this home on the edge of his western lands. It was a torn down shack that was dark and looked like it could fell any minute.

If he would have just fixed up his own home instead of worrying about getting more property his life probably wouldn't be so bad Sesshoumaru thought. He walked up to the door.

"Lord Sesshoumaru," Fufu opened the door with sarcasm.

"You don't look worried, Fufu." Sesshoumaru said cockily.

"Aw, does that surprise you."

"Enough games you know what I came here for."

"Well come in." Fufu turned around and walked into the dark, musky area that he called his living room.

Sesshoumaru looked around before he followed inside.

Once inside a demon shut the door behind Sesshoumaru. He turned around and looked.

Kagome was in the next room over, she could hear everything.

"Oh did that startle you my lord."

"First of all Fufu, sarcasm does not become you, secondly it was expected."

"Hmm, so what brings you to my so humble of a home?"

"You know what brings me, and toy with me any longer and you shall die." Sesshoumaru's growl was becoming lower and more threatening.

"Yes well, we will so who would die."

"Are you tempting me?"

"NO, my lord, not before my proposition is met."

"What do you want?" Sesshoumaru already knew what he wanted.

"I want land."

"You have land."

"I want more land, I need more room."

"You can't even take care of the land you have." Sesshoumaru was getting annoyed.

"Well you will either give me land, or your mate will die."

"My mate has powers beyond your imaginable dreams." Sesshoumaru laughed.

"Hmmm, then how did she end up here, she is weak."

"She may be thought weak, but you will see."

The demons that were in the room with Kagome picked her up, her hands and feet were tied together, and brought her into the room where the two men stood toe to toe.

"Really," Fufu spoke sarcastically as he smacked Kagome over the face. "Then how come she didn't do anything about that. I could take her right now and she couldn't do anything."

Sesshoumaru tried to hold his inner demon from the anger it felt seeing his mate being abused, his hands started shaking and his eyes were turning red, his heart started to beat faster as the tears ran down Kagome's face.

Kagome could hear Sesshoumaru heartbeat. (How) she thought. She felt his pain; she realized she was feeling a lot more than she should be.

"Touch her again Fufu, and getting more land won't be an option unless it is land for your grave."

"My grave huh," he looked at the demons in the room and laughed at Sesshoumaru's threat. He then bent over and kissed Kagome as Kagome tried to squirm away from him. at that moment Sesshoumaru lost all control over his demon half and attacked he picked up Fufu and held him up against the wall with one hand by his neck like he had done Jaken previously, he cracked his knuckles and the poison came to the fore front he stuck them in Fufu gut, "Like I said, your grave."

He turned to see the demons attack him from behind when he went full blown.

Kagome looked over and seen a big white dog being attacked by little demons. One by one he was tearing them apart until the last one was gone. When he realized they were all dead he looked over at Kagome, surprisingly he wasn't ashamed, he was still pissed off. Why didn't she use her powers she might not remember how but she should of still been able to call upon them. He walked up to her and bowed in front of her putting his nose by her leg.

"Sesshoumaru what is all this?" she was frightened of seeing his anger.

"This is I, the true form of Sesshoumaru No-Taisho, your mate."

"This can't be happening, get away from me."

"You are me, understand that."

flashback of Kagome

At that moment a vision came in Kagome's mind once again of her chasing a white dog through the woods, the vision continued until they reached the spring, a spring that she remembered. In the vision when she looked down at the water staring back at her was a full blown white dog like Sesshoumaru was now.

"End of flashback

Kagome shook her head how can that be. She wanted to deny that any of this was true.

"This is all lies; you are messing with my head."

Sesshoumaru had calmed down enough to go back to his normal form, he stood in front of her exhausted from the battle and from changing, and he hadn't received much sleep the night before.

"I am telling you the truth. Why can't you just believe me?"

"Everyone says they are telling the truth. Who am I to believe?"

"Try believing your heart. You have an inner demon too, it may be sleeping but it is there, I know it is still."

"Then why can't you help me, if you are my mate, help me to remember?"

"I can only help you once there is no doubt."

"I don't doubt any of this, so what doubt are you talking about?"

"I haven't a clue at this moment. I will be honest with you, but give me one week that is all I ask, one week to prove to you that you belong here, or I will personally take you back."

"I will give you one week, no longer. Now undo me please."

"Undo yourself." He demanded.

"I can't." she whined trying to move her hands and her feet from the rope."

"Let me teach you something?"

"What?"

"Picture in your mind the ropes untying."

"What?"

"Just do it."

Kagome reluctantly closed her eyes and pictured the ropes untying from behind her back when suddenly the ropes fell to the ground. "How did you do that?"

"I didn't, you did."

"This is too much for me right now, I just want some rest."

"Come I will take you home, I mean back to the palace."

He held out his hand and lifted her up off the cold damp floor, as he picked her up he noticed she could barely walk, her leg was hurt and with her not knowing her powers, she wasn't healing. He picked her up and carried her all the way back to the palace.

When they arrived at the palace everyone came in Segome started to cry thinking Kagome was really hurt. Kagome looked at Segome. "What are you doing here?"

"I belong here." Segome was still a little reluctant of telling her who she was.

"How is that?" Kagome asked even more confused.

"I am Segome. You…your daughter."

"You lied to me." she spoke almost breathless.

"No, I never lied to you. Remember, all I said was that it was best if I didn't tell you my name. I have lied about nothing."

"I see. I am too tired to fight it." Kagome tried to move from Sesshoumaru's grip but she was still too weak. Sesshoumaru nodded at the others and carried Kagome up to the master bedroom where they could get some rest. He laid her down on the bed and began to remove her pants.

"What do you think you are doing?

"I need to take a look at your leg. Please, you are not using your healing powers, so you must let me take a look."

"Just tell me how to use my healing powers."

"Remember how I told you to do the rope?"

"Yes Sesshoumaru,"

"Well you must concentrate on healing the pain, that you feel, and your powers will find the wound and heal it."

flashback

She envisioned her and Sesshoumaru kissing on that very bed. Him leaning over her rubbing his sword against her sweet spot.

end of flashback

"Kagome, you there?"

"I was concentrating on the pain." She had to make up why she had just once again spaced out.

"Well I had only seen you get that flushed when… never mind."

"I am not flushed."

Sesshoumaru could smell the heat arises from her, he knew that she was turned on and his blood beast wanted to participate in the action. His sword had an immediate reaction. "Anyway", he said readjusting his thoughts, "would it bother you if I sleep in here with you?"

"That would be alright, I will trust you to keep your hands to yourself."

"Not a problem. I will be right here in this recliner." He would do it, just to win her trust back.

That same evening Sesshoumaru got up without waking her and went out into the rest of the castle. It was silent everyone else was in bed sleeping. He went down into the dungeon "Inuyasha why must you hate so much that you have put her through all of this?"

"Why must you hate so much that you have made me stay here?"

"For the crimes that you have committed not only against me but against my mate and others, this is the least I could do to ensure their safety."

"You can't hold me here forever."

"Trust me that is not my intentions. Keep it up and your suffering can end very abruptly."

"What do you want Sesshoumaru, why have you come, to gloat about my misery, hearing these screams coming from my tortured cell mates?"

"Those screams are muted to me, I don't have to hear them, and you on the other hand don't get that luxury."

"What do you want lord Sesshoumaru." Inuyasha's sarcasm was bitter.

"I have a proposition for you."

"What may that be?"

"I have a way to find out if you are truly Kagome's mate. I will take you out of this dungeon but must cast a spell for you to leave your power here, I will take you up to her room, and if you are truly her mate, I will walk away from all of this and you can have it all, but if you are not then you must either stay in this dungeon until such a time I feel you have changed, or you must go back to the modern era not to return."

"Why should I believe in what you say that you have found a way to prove her mate? Why haven't you done it?"

The question from his baka brother had sent shivers up his spine, he had tried and it hadn't worked, did it mean that he wasn't her mate. No matter what he had to do this, he had to prove that Inuyasha was not her mate. "For reasons of my own I can not do this but you can and you will or I will kill you."

"What is it?"

Sesshoumaru then pulled the black diamond from his pocket. "You must try to give her memories back to her out of this?"

"What makes you think that black diamond holds her memories."

"When you and Jaken gave her the poison Jaken had her memories put into this only her mate can release them."

"What makes you think I want her to have her memories back?"

"You try or you die." Sesshoumaru was angry at Inuyasha for he could not make him do this, but he had to know if this hanyou was her mate, he had to prove that there was no other but him.

"Fine, but if she is and she receives her memory back, you will leave anyway correct?"

"Yes."

"I have your word?"

"yes." Sesshoumaru had regret in his voice, his worse fear at this very moment could come true and he was willing to give up everything. A part of him knew though that Inuyasha was not her mate, but the other half doubted just the same.

Sesshoumaru then cast a spell to disbar all of Inuyasha's powers for the time being that he was away from the cell; he slightly grabbed the back of his arm and led him to the master bedroom, where Kagome lay sleeping. He had put a spell on her to sleep so she wouldn't wake up and find Inuyasha standing over her. He then handed the black diamond to Inuyasha.

Inuyasha looked at Kagome holding the diamond in his hand. It still remained unchanged. He turned to Sesshoumaru and handed him back the diamond, when it went into Sesshoumaru's hand, subtle warmth came over it.

"You actually thought that I would have been her true mate brother?" Inuyasha smirked.

"I had to know that you weren't."

"Well I may be wrong, and I may have done a lot wrong but only a fool would not be able to see where she belongs."

"Don't think you are getting out of our bargain."

"Well what if you just leave my powers where they are, and I can stay with the group, if I have no power how would I be of threat?"

"What made you think I wouldn't have killed you without your power hanyou?"

"Brother, if you were going to kill me, you would of done it already, you could kill me with or with out my power."

"Well, I must talk with the rest of the group including Kagome. If she chooses not to forgive you than our bargain still stands. For now you must go back to the dungeon."

"Whatever man, that is one thing I could never understand. Why would you choose that stupid miko over your own flesh and blood?"

"Stop calling her a miko, she is more."

"Yea right, you can't even look at me and tell me that you know that she is your mate." Inuyasha at that moment had a reason for pushing Sesshoumaru; he was trying to get him to realize that Kagome was his mate, even though he knew it could have cost him his life.

At that moment Sesshoumaru bitch slapped Inuyasha leaving claw marks across his face, "Don't dare speak to me in that tone, I know what she is."

"Then why doesn't she have her memories, brother?" Inuyasha held his cheek, very well expecting another blow.

"Enough," he grabbed Inuyasha's arm once again and led him back to his cell in the dungeon. Where he slammed the big metal door closed. He had to end the conversation; he knew that Kagome was his mate, why would his baka brother believe that he didn't. he was frustrated, he loved Kagome, yea when she left and he hadn't of known why he became cold but he didn't doubt his love for her so why the stupid curse didn't release it's hold on her he couldn't answer. What was it he doubted so much? Why couldn't he figure it out? Why would he test Inuyasha on being Kagome's mate? Tired of trying to answer all of his own confusing questions he decided to return to Kagome side for when she awoke. When he returned to Kagome he noticed that the black diamond in his pocket had unusual warmth to it, he pulled it out of his pocket and held it in his hands, but still nothing happened.


	8. Shared Dreams

_**A lost life**_

_**Chapter Eight**_

_**Shared dreams**_

He sat in the recliner next to the bed and stared at Kagome laying there. He held the black diamond in between his palms. He wasn't thinking about his surroundings all he could think about was her, how could he get her to remember all that he did. He laid his head back on the recliner and started to reminisce once again on their past together.

Flashback

It was a sweltering hot summer afternoon when they were walking through the woods trying to find a spot to train. They came to a very small clearing surrounded by woods when Sesshoumaru decided that would be the perfect spot.

"Here, right here."

"Shouldn't we find someplace bigger sessh?"

"No must learn to fight in small places."

They took their stance and bowed to each showing respect for the lesson about to begin. They fought in a way of training, Kagome and Sesshoumaru fought for sometime before Kagome's exhaustion caused her to falter landing Sesshoumaru in a quirky way on top of her. He remember looking in her eyes and seeing the love and passion she had for him. he couldn't help but to want to take her right then and their, they had been through the claiming and had got to know each other but had held off on the mating for reasons Kagome's doubts. Respectfully Sesshoumaru went to get up when Kagome reached up and grabbed his arm.

"You don't have to this time, I am ready." She could sense that he was reluctant, that he wanted her.

"So you doubt no longer my love for you."

"No I don't." Kagome smiled a seductive way.

"You realize what this will mean?"

"Yes, I want you Sesshoumaru, I know that you are my mate."

He came back down upon her, breathing in her scent. His blood beast was coming through his eyes turning them red, "Does this scare you?"

"Look at mine, my love, tell me does it scare me?"

She reached up and pulled his head down to hers kissing him and grazing her tongue among his fangs. She could feel the reaction to his swords arousal. He returned his kiss to her, rubbing her fangs with his tongue making her moan into him. he had wanted her, he had wanted to mate her for quite sometime. He rubbed his hands up and down her side finding their way to her breast, he rubbed her breast through her kimono finding her nipple, making her buck for him even more.

He then slid down her body untying her obi with his teeth and tossing it to the side. "Skillful are we, I like."

"You haven't seen nothing yet."

He then took his hands and slid up from her knees under her kimono and untied her kimono and undershirt, as he let the kimono fall to the sides of her. He pushed up her shirt and took his tongue from her belly button up to her bare harden nipples. He tickled her sides with his claws and teased her nipples with his fangs. Her moans became louder as clouds started to close in on the area. He continued by taking his claws and hands and taking off her kimono and undershirt leaving her top half bare to the world, goose bumps went through her body. He then taking his claws slid from her cheeks, to her neck, over her breast, down her side, to the waist of her pants pulling them off of her. He bent back over and continued to nibble on her neck working his way down, once again stopping for another taste of her pebbled nipples. His blood beast was growing more excited. He worked his way down to the top of her underwear when his fangs grazed her belly as he grabbed the underwear to pull them off. "oh… oh… oh…" she moaned.

"Sorry, did I hurt you?" he looked as a little bit of her blood trickled down towards her flower.

"There is pleasure in the right kind of pain." She smiled.

Sesshoumaru groaned, he licked the blood following it to her sweet spot. Her whole body jolted with pleasure as his tongue kept messages her clit. The clouds rolled over the rain was coming in.

He took one hand and continued to message her nipple as his other hand came down to aid him in his quest. He took his finger in and out, one and then finally two. She was a virgin so he had to loosen her for him to be able to ease himself in. her moaning grew louder as her knees began to shake. The heat rising from her made Sesshoumaru more than happy with his actions. He arose, "You like?"

"Sessh… don't stop."

"But must calm you down before I can proceed, anticipation is the best."

"Oh no, but I am shaking."

"Always a good thing."

She stared into his eyes and she started to calm down when he bent over and proceeded to do it again. she began to shake quicker this time than before, and unlike before he continued until her pleasurable screams came forth rumbling the forest area around them. Pleased with himself he arose to his knees and took off his armor and his clothes as he looked at his mate laying below him shaking from excitement. She was so vulnerable at his touch, he couldn't help but to stare at her naked beauty. She reached up to him rubbing her hands over his bare chest. Scraping her claws down his pecks. It began to sprinkle but they were so lost in each other that it didn't matter, it actually made it more pleasurable. He leaned over her and closed in on her mouth for a kiss. He rubbed his sword between her legs rubbing her sweet spot once again sending her into him. "Now this is it. Are you sure?" he asked her, pulsing for her at that very moment.

"OH Yes, just don't hurt me."

"I won't never."

She closed her eyes and she gripped his arms as if she was holding on for dear life in a raging storm, digging her claws into his arms causing him to bleed. He eased himself inside of her not all of him at first, he didn't want to hurt her, then with each passing motion he went deeper and deeper until her body was one with his.

"Open your eyes my love, look at me as my equal as the love of my life."

She opened her eyes and looked at his. Both their eyes were red, fore their blood beast was raging. He continued to go in and out harder and harder as the rain started to pour down, their excitement grew stronger and stronger as they played together as unit.

He got up on his knees and flipped Kagome over as he ran his claws down her back. He penetrated her from behind as he bent over and nibbled on her neck, he reached one claw underneath her playing with her harp as he continued his thrust. She began to shake once again as the explosion of pleasure came to the forefront. Her soul shattered as he bit down on the back of her neck joining them completely. She screamed out in pleasure once again, the rain pounding on their naked bodies causing water to drip off of him onto her. Her enjoyment aroused him even more, he straightened himself up and gathered her hair as he slightly pulled it, pulling her deeper into him. lightening started crashing to the ground around them and the rain continued to pound on them. He pulled out and flipped her back over. "You okay?"

She wrapped her legs around his waist pulling him back into her; letting him know that she was more than alright. She grabbed his arms from beneath him having him fall onto her. She buried her face into his neck; when his movements became so erotic that she bit down on his color bone to try to keep herself from screaming. The pleasure of her bite sent him into pure oblivion as he released all the tension within her that he had held all this time.

The rain started to calm down as he backed up enough to look in her most precious face. She was his mate for now and forever, and nothing could change that.

End of flashback

The entire time that he was so called dreaming of the events that had previously happened the black diamond got hot, glowed, and transferred that memory to Kagome having her dream it at the same time. When he looked down at his hands he saw the black diamond as it was before but saw round circles on his palms as if the diamond had burned him. what the hell he thought as he then placed it back into his pockets and arose from his recliner. He bent over and kissed Kagome on the fore head awakening her.

"Sesshoumaru?"

"Yes it is me. you sleep good?"

"I think I slept, but I had a dream so vivid as if it was real."

"Tell me, maybe I can help you." Sesshoumaru was shocked at what she was about to say.

"I dreamed of the forest and the rain and you, I umm… oh never mind just another dream."

"You have had others?" he knew well what the dream was but didn't understand how it go there.

"Never mind Sesshoumaru."

"Well I am going to the kitchen to get breakfast started it is going to be a long day, you can sleep longer if you like or you can come down when you feel ready."

"Is there a place where I may bathe?"

"This is a master bedroom," he snickered. "Yes right through that door."

"I have noticed that in this time you wear a different attire. Is there some clean of mine? Maybe from before?" she was hoping that if she wore something that was old to her that maybe she would start to remember a little more, after the dream the night before she wanted to remember everything. She needed to know if it was all true.

"Yes, I will get them and lay some out for you, you can go ahead and take your bath, you are safe here. I will shut the door behind me and lay your clothes on the bed."

With that she got up and headed towards the bathroom and Sesshoumaru turned to the dresser, he looked in the top drawer than he remember about her having that dream, he wondered if it was the same as his. He decided that he wanted her to wear the same clothing that she had on that day, maybe it would bring back that dream to her. So he went to the bottom drawer of the dresser, he kept it there, fore that particular outfit had meaning to him. When he opened the drawer he noticed not only her clothes but Shippou's pelt that he had put there. (I need to give this back to Shippou,) he thought as he took it and put it in his kimono. He then grabbed the white, silver, and black kimono, undershirt, and pants from the drawer. He opened the top drawer and got out her underwear as he placed them on the bed. He couldn't help but to once again get aroused at the thought of her wearing them again. he sighed and turned around to leave the room.

Kagome was taking her bath when the memory of the dream last night kept flooding her mind. Normally dreams are forgotten but this one was like it was imbedded in her memory. Did he plant it there? Is it a true memory or just a dream? She continued on her bath so she could go down and face the others whom she still barely knew.

As Sesshoumaru was stepping off of the stairs Shippou ran up to him, "Where is my pelt, you promised me my pelt, Inuyasha is here, I know he has destroyed it."

"NO Shippou, I have it."

"Give, give, pleaaase."

"Patients little one, it is right here." He then pulled the orange fiery pelt out of his kimono and handed it to the excited little fox that was jumping up and down in front of him."

"Thank you, thank you."

"You welcome, where is everyone?"

"There are in the kitchen and dinning room, Segome is in the kitchen making Jaken cook everyone's breakfast as she is using him for target practice every time he slows down. Sesshoumaru can I ask you something?"

"Make it quick, you mother will be down soon and I wish to have everything ready."

"I know that you thought I had betrayed but since now you know that I didn't, can… can…"

"Spit it out." Sesshoumaru was getting a little frustrated with Shippou's exuberance.

"Call you dad?" he said rushed.

"Yes, son. Always." He put his hand on Shippou who couldn't help to keep bouncing with excitement as he led him back into the dinning room where everyone is gathered.

As he walked into the dinning room everyone stood up to his presence. "Oh come on, sit down we are beyond that respect.

"Where is Kagome?" Sango asked.

"She is washing up. How is everyone holding up?"

"We are all good, getting a good laugh out of Segome in there beating up Jaken." Miroku laughed.

"Well, everyone needs a good laugh. Rin, you doing ok?"

"Yes, been crazy around here without you dad, but you know I use to it."

"Well that is all going to change, now that my family is back as one, no one will be separating."

The door to the kitchen swung open as Jaken was hurrying through being kicked in the ass by Segome, "Chop…chop… breakfast must not be late you little green imp."

"Bite me Segome."

"Jaken I suggest you take that back quickly." Sesshoumaru cocked his eye.

"But master, anything is better than this even death."

"Segome do you wish to fulfill the slimes request? I do have the Tenseiga on hand?"

"My lord please, I just ask when my debt to you should be paid?"

"For as long as you took Kagome from me you shall now live in misery for twice as long."

With that Jaken bowed his head in front of his master and placed the tray he had been carrying on the table. Segome kicked him in the ass again "Come on got to get the rest, or I have permission to use my greatest force."

whining, "I am going." Jaken turned to go get the rest of the food from the kitchen.

While Sesshoumaru and the others talked about past events in the dining room Kagome was upstairs. She got out of the shower and walked into the room stealthily. She saw the clothes on the bed as she saw them she remember back to the dream. Was it for real? Here sat the clothes she had worn in the dream? Was Sesshoumaru putting this all on? She got dressed examining each article as she put them on. They fit perfectly. She knew that there was an intoxicating smell on the clothing, she knew a part of it was hers but who's was the others? It smelled almost like his, but was it? She then moved to the mirror and started to brush her hair with a brush she had found sitting there. When the brush hit the back of her neck she flinched in pain at the same time feeling a heat arise with in her. She turned and pulled up her long hair and noticed two fang marks on the back of her neck. She couldn't believe what she saw had he done this to her last night, or was it from the dream? She then headed to the door.

Moments before he heard her footsteps hit the stairs in front of the room he felt a burning sensation where he knew his mark use to be. He could smell the heat arising from her. He let a growl slip from his lips as the anticipation of tasting her again was driving him crazy.

"What is it?" Miroku asked.

"Honey, if you don't know what that sound is by now then there is no point in asking, leave him alone." Sango interrupted.

Sesshoumaru was lost in his thoughts of Kagome when seconds later Kagome came through the double doors into the dining room, her hair flowing down to her sides her beauty outshining even itself. It was so quiet for a second that you could hear the racing of Sesshoumaru's thoughts as he stared at her.

"Dad, think nicely when you are in our presence." Segome piped up.

"How would you know what I am thinking."

"Imagination speaks wonders."

Within seconds you heard both Rin and Shippou holler and run straight for her, "Mom, mom, mom."

Stunned at their sudden movement Kagome froze in the doorway, they stopped inches from her.

"Mom you ok?" Shippou sounded concerned.

"Yes, I have just been through a lot, I am not mad at you Shippou, this is all still a little hard to believe."

"No matter what, I am still your son right?"

A voice came into her head, he needs reassurance.

"What the hell." She questioned where the voice had come from.

"I sorry mom, I made you mad."

"No it isn't you, I heard something."

"Are you ok," Segome and Sango came up to her and grabbed her hand to lead her to the table.

Sesshoumaru had tested the link that they once had created, he wanted to see if it still worked. Now he knew his way in, now he knew how to get her to listen.

"I am alright, must just be everything that is going on." She was a little dazed.

With that they all sat down at the dinning room table and ate breakfast with little to no conversation. They were trying to keep the surroundings calm until such time that Kagome felt comfortable with them.


	9. Chapter 9

A LOST LIFE

CHAPTER NINE

After breakfast Segome went in and dragged Jaken into the kitchen.

"moth… Kagome Jaken has something to say to you."

"Jaken?"

"Yes he is my father's servant. He is the cause of all of this and I want it out in the open now."

"Segome, this isn't the time." Sesshoumaru was concerned, he didn't want Kagome to go back to where they started. He was making progress and he wanted to keep it.

"He took my mother from me, and now my mother doesn't even know who I am." Segome started to cry.

*Kagome, she needs you* She went to leave the room when Kagome stood up, "You didn't lie to me Segome, you told me about your mother not knowing who you were, and you were right. I don't know who you are, but do you just expect me to give up." She hadn't a clue where the voice came from but something told her that it was the only truth she had at this moment.

Segome turned around, "Why give up? We are all here."

"Well isn't that what you were going to do?" Kagome got up off the chair and walked over to her daughter. "I am here, I may not remember, I may even doubt, but give me this chance."

Sesshoumaru inner beast kept repeating the word (doubt, doubt). Sesshoumaru just shrugged it off once again and walked up to his daughter and his mate.

"You two need time alone, Segome why don't you take her out to the gardens and talk, I will stay here and make sure Jaken does his job and talk with the others."

"What about me dad?" Rin whined.

"You will have your time, now let this be theirs."

*listen, look, and you will see the truth revealed* the voice once again spoke in Kagome's mind. Segome took Kagome's hand and led her to the stagnate garden. "Why is everything not blooming?"

"It has been stagnating since you have been gone. It has refused to grow."

"Well now that I am here, why hasn't it started to grow?" Kagome questioned.

"I really don't know, maybe it because you don't believe that you really belong here, maybe it is because you don't understand your power, it was your power that created it."

"You know about my power?"

"Yes mother, I have similar power. You taught me some before you were taken away."

"You would think that if this power is great, that it would be natural and I wouldn't have to remember them."

"Well in all honesty think about it, if you don't remember them and are ignoring them how can you understand them or see them work?"

"You know Segome, you are really smart for your age."

"Well, look who my parents are."

"So I have you, Rin, and Shippou?"

"Yes, I am by blood of both you and Sesshoumaru, and the kits are adopted. You still loved them as if they were blood though."

Kagome sat down on the concrete blocks and started playing with a row of flowers.

*FLASHBACK*

She was in the garden, the flowers were almost glowing. They were so beautiful, all different colors. She was running her hand along them. She looked up and saw her children running through the walkway chasing each other. Then she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and saw him again. Sesshoumaru standing there in all his glory like a proud father and husband.

*END OF FLASHBACK*

She felt the hand on her shoulder when she turned around and saw Segome, "You alright?" she asked.

"Yes I was just day dreaming."

"Well mother," she pointed to the flowers, "If this is what day dreaming does keep day dreaming."

The flowers started to move with like a spirit of their own as you could see they were rapidly getting their colors.

"Wow," Kagome then had a wave of understanding come through her. She knew that something was special and she knew this wasn't a dream it was real. She really did have powers within her that she didn't understand. She started to think maybe it all wasn't a lie. What was she to do? Should she believe this man who claims to have her heart and her life. Maybe the dream was a memory coming back to her, maybe that is what these flashbacks are. All she could do was sit there and think these thoughts over and over in her mind.

Segome got down on her knees in front of her mother and put her head in her moms lap. "Maybe you remember to love me mom."

"I may not remember you darling, but I think that my love for you may still be here." She placed her hand on her daughters Burnett hair.

"Thank you."

They sat there together, Segome enjoying the time with her mother, and her mother enjoying the time to get to know her daughter. They talked about all sorts of things, by the end of the time together Kagome felt like she actually had someone she could definitely trust. With in about three hours Kagome decided that she wanted to go be by herself she wanted to figure out what the voice was that she had been hearing. Was it just her conscious? "Segome, go back into your father and the rest of the group and tell them I am going out into the woods for a little bit to think."

"You sure you will be ok." Segome was hoping that her mother wasn't going to run off again.

"Yes I will be fine."

With that they went their separate ways as Segome headed into the house, Kagome headed towards the woods.

"Where did Kagome go?" Sango was the first person to see Segome.

"She wanted some time alone to think, she isn't mad. She went out into the woods."

"You sure that Sesshoumaru would of allowed that. She doesn't know her powers or anything."

"I am sure that he will protect her, even from here."

"Segome, where is Kagome." Miroku was next to question as soon as she arrived in the study where the rest of the group had been having a discussion about what needed to come.

The whole group turned to look at the two girls, "For the last time she went to be alone for a while to think in the woods."

"Was she distraught?" Sesshoumaru questioned.

"No, I think she was actually happy."

With that they join the group, Sesshoumaru was dazing in and out as the conversation continued.

Rin and Shippou were bouncing on Jaken using him as a trampoline.

"sweetheart, why haven't you tried to grab Kagome lately I am shocked?" Sango questioned her mate.

"I am tired of being smacked." Laughed Miroku.

"Come on you remember the look on dad's face last time you did that." Segome giggled remember the last time Miroku put his hand on Kagome's but her dad got furious.

"yea and without her remembering me, I could get more than hit."

They stayed together joking with one another about the past and things they would like to do in the future as Sesshoumaru had bigger things on his mind, talking to Kagome.

She walked into the forest not far from the mansion, she remember what happened the last time she wondered too far and she wasn't ready to go through all that again, at least she knew that she was safe with him. She sat down by a nearby tree and started to cry, she was hurt that she couldn't remember her daughter, she was tired of all that was going on.

"Kagome, why do you cry?" Came the voice in her head.

"Who are you?"

"I am a part of you that you have forgotten."

"Then help me to remember."

"I can't."

"why not you have access to my mind."

"you don't know who I am, therefore I can't help you in that way, in order to understand who I am you must first understand yourself."

"I want to know who you are, I want to know who I am, I want to know my daughter." She started to cry heavier.

"Don't cry, I am not there to wipe the tear from your eye."

"Your from my dream?"

"Yes, I was there to comfort you then like I am here to comfort you now, only now I can comfort you at all times."

"So you know things about me in this time, and in that time?"

"I know all there is to know about you current past and your forgotten past."

"so help me figure some things out."

"How?"

"Let me ask you some question, all I want is an honest answer."

"but what if the answer's you do not like?"

"A lot of things lately I have not liked. I feel that though I don't know who you are, or how you are here, that I can trust you." Kagome was so concentrated in the conversation that she couldn't move.

The night before after Sesshoumaru had taken Inuyasha back to the dungeon, Jaken had snuck down there and set him free for fear of his life of betraying the man. No one had even thought about checking on him that morning.

"Since you are a part of me can you tell me about these dreams and day dreams?"

"Well I have a feeling that they are memories coming to the surface some that you are sharing with your mate."

"You know who my mate is?"

"Yes, even though there is doubt somewhere I feel I know who your mate is."

"Tell me."

"I can't for in telling you, would create more doubt, inside you know, you must figure that out on your own."

"How would one know if they are mated?"

"You see in the mating process, one gets bitten in a certain location which shows commitment. You know you are mated if you have been bitten."

"What does the bite look like?"

"It usually looks like two fang marks, it can be place anywhere on the body but is usually near the neck."

"If I had one how would I find out who gave it to me?"

"Why do you have one?"

"I am not saying, it is just a question."

"well first of all, the person that you think about all the time usually is your mate, and if you rub the mate mark, if you look around you; you will see your mate having a reaction."

"What kind of reaction?"

"You will just have to look and see, for it is different for all."

"How do I know if what Sesshoumaru says is true?"

"by looking within yourself."

"How was it that Sesshoumaru knew where I was to save me? how would I know if he is truly my mate?"

"A mate always knows when their partner is in trouble."

"So you are saying that he is my mate."

"I have said no…"

Suddenly Inuyasha jumps out from behind the tree standing right in front of Kagome.

Being linked with Kagome the way that he was he could feel her heart race, and her fear arise. He quickly left the others and was at Kagome's side by the time that she could scream. She tried to move, but realized that she couldn't.

"Listen, I am not here to hurt you." Inuyasha was pleading with Kagome.

"what are you doing here baka? How did you get out of the dungeon?"

"I would like to ask you the same question Sesshoumaru?" Kagome asked.

"I felt your distress and came to see what the matter was, but enough about me." Sesshoumaru growled at Inuyasha.

"I was let out of the dungeon by our good servant Jaken. But I have not come to harm Kagome."

Kagome tried to stand but she couldn't move and Sesshoumaru could sense her anxiety.

"If you wish no harm upon her, then why have you made her immobile?"

"Brother, I just wanted her to listen. I wanted to apologize and to make right what I had done wrong."

"You haven't the right to call me brother, we had our agreement."

"But you said Sesshoumaru, that you would speak to her, to see about me joining the group."

Kagome looked at Sesshoumaru with pain in her eyes, she felt betrayed again. Inuyasha was wanting to join the group and he was actually going to ask her if she would allow him to.

"I told you brother that I would not force any decision upon her and if she chose not to forgive you that I was not pushing the issue."

"Then I should have the right to apologize for myself. To speak to her myself; not through you."

"You gave up that right by the way that you treated her in the modern era."

"Will you two just stop, I am here you know. I can make my own decision. I am tired of running and fighting."

"I just want to protect you Kagome." Sesshoumaru heart was once again put aside.

"Well stop. Release me Inuyasha, now."

Inuyasha released the binding spell that he had on Kagome. She took her hand and rubbed the back of her neck trying to relieve the stiffness that had come. Instantaneously Sesshoumaru wanted to fall to his knees.

"What is wrong brother, is something umm… so called troubling you."

"Shut up you jack ass I don't need your input."

Kagome continued to rub her neck, "You ever put a binding spell on me again, Inuyasha you will not be forgiven. And what is up with you Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru fell on all fours right in front of Kagome. Trying not to speak or to grab her.

"Oh he is just have a moment right now."

"Inuyasha you are dead." He just wished that she would stop rubbing her neck, she was driving him crazy. He knew he had to get her to stop before she realized.

"Sesshoumaru do you need help."

"No, Kagome, nothing you can help me with at this time."

"What is going on? You look like you are in pain." Kagome spoke to Sesshoumaru.

"You act like you are pain brother, it looks like a pain that requires a certain touch. Not something that I can help you with."

"What are you talking about Inuyasha?" Kagome wasn't even paying attention to the conversation that she had earlier; she didn't even realize that she was rubbing the spot.

"Unless it stops it is a pain that you will never have the privilege of feeling; Inuyasha."

"How can I make it stop?" Inuyasha laughed.

He knew that she knew about the mate marks but how could he get this effect, hers was gone. Why was this bothering him so much. He reached up and touched where is own would of been subconsciously.

At that moment Kagome felt this twang come from within her as a burning feeling come from the back of her neck. "What the hell?"

"Not you too, Kagome, is everyone getting sick around me. oh I forgot a different type of sickness." Inuyasha had a shit eating laugh.

"What did you do Inuyasha?" Kagome asked not having a clue what was going on.

"Me nothing,"

"Listen I think you two should have some time alone, I just came here Kagome, to apologize to you for everything that I have done, and to ask for your forgiveness so I can join the group."

"Enough is said Inuyasha, you need to leave."

"But I want to know from her, if she forgives me or not."

"Inuyasha, leave now." Sesshoumaru was trying so hard to get a grasp on the growing feeling inside of him that he was starting to growl. He felt his inner beast wanting to come out and play with his mate. His body started to transform in to it's full state. Sesshoumaru had to get away he didn't want to scare Kagome.

Much to his surprise her needs were growing stronger as well for Sesshoumaru. Her body began to shake and to tremble.

Inuyasha took off through the forest as the rest of the tachi were coming up to them. They could sense in the air that someone was having a hard time controlling their manners. With the scent of them coming, Sesshoumaru stood up straight in reaction dropping his hand from the spot on his chest.

Kagome being released of pressure let go of her neck and stood up as well.

"What was all that about Sesshoumaru?"

"I don't know quite yet, but sure that I will figure it out."

(My lady,) came the voice back in Kagome's head which we all know was Sesshoumaru.

"Not now." Kagome said aloud not knowing that this voice could hear her internally.

(but my lady, did you forget our earlier conversation.)

"I said not now," Kagome spoke even louder.

"Not now what? I haven't done anything, I am still over here?" Sesshoumaru spoke still recovering from what she had done to him and knowing full well who she was talking to.

"Not you."

"UH.. Kagome we are the only ones here at this moment. You want the group to not come now? Is there something on your mind that requires privacy."

"No I didn't even know the rest were coming. I was just um.. talking to myself."

"Ok then if you wish not to tell me that is fine, I probably already know anyway." Sesshoumaru spoke so low that Kagome could barely understand him.

"Know what?"

"Not now." Sesshoumaru said back to her as she had said to him earlier.

"Hey what are you two doing out here, is everything ok. We heard a shriek." Segome went to her moms side.

"mom, mom." Shippou and Rin ran for their mother, Shippou grabbed a hold of his mother's leg as Rin stopped a few feet back still a little leery of approaching her mother, so she wrapped her arms around her father's leg.

Sango and Miroku stood by both of them with them all forming kind of a circle.

"Everything is fine, just thought I saw something that freaked me out."

"Freaked?" Sango questioned.

"It is a modern term, for being scared." Miroku spoke softly to his wife.

"Oh I see, so Kagome are you still upset with us. I mean will you come back to the palace with us now. It is about time for lunch." Sango wanted her friend back, she wished that Kagome could just remember everything.

"I wasn't upset with you, I just wanted some time alone to think, when Sesshoumaru thought I was in trouble he came to me. wait a minute…" she thought for a second before continuing. She thought about the conversation that she had previously with the voice, Sesshoumaru knew that she was in trouble. Didn't the voice say that her mate would know, did that mean that…

"What Kagome? Did you remember something?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"No, I was just thinking."

With that they had decided to go back to the mansion to get some lunch. Sesshoumaru and the children were leading the way for Kagome, and Sango and Miroku were behind her.

"By the way, Miroku, keep your hands to yourself." Said Kagome out of the blue.

"What did you say?" Sesshoumaru asked as everyone looked at her.

"I don't know, it just came out. Why does it mean something?"

Sango started to shriek in excitement, "Yes see my husband here use to grab your ass all the time, he has what we like to call a cursed hand. Can't you see, you are starting to remember, you know you belong here."

"I see," Kagome said doubtfully. They all continued there walk towards the palace.

(Kagome don't speak, just listen, Sango speaks the truth, I can't tell you much, but I can tell you this you are on the right track, I will be here if you shall need me, and you must know you can speak to me without being aloud.) The voice spoke in her head again.

(without being aloud) she thought.

(Yes with out being aloud.)

(you heard me?) Kagome was shocked.

(Yes that is what I meant by being aloud.)

(I see.) Kagome was shocked that this voice was so much apart of her that they could communicate just by her thinking. If he could do that she wondered if he actually knew all of her thoughts. Who was this voice and why was this voice so concerned with her understanding?


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter ten

The battle of Naraku

As they returned to the castle Jaken already had dinner made and ready for them. "My lord, I have taken it upon myself to make lunch, hoping that it would put me in somewhat of your good graces."

"You mind telling me how Inuyasha got out of the dungeon? You are the only one in the household that chooses not to be a part of the team." Sesshoumaru growled.

"I am sorry, my master, I just wanted to have him forgive me for my betrayal.? Please… please… don't be mad. He swore to her no harm."

"I think Jaken that you better worry about the betrayal that you have done to me and what is mine before you think about the betrayal with him."

"Did he try to harm her?"

"Harm her no, he scared her and that was enough." Sesshoumaru couldn't believe after everything, that this imp would disobey him again.

"How did you know that he scared me Sesshoumaru." Kagome questioned.

"I have told you, but you choose not to believe."

"I have a little faith, it is building as times surpasses. I just wish there was someway to get it back entirely, I am getting so tired of guessing."

"Of guessing what? I don't know how I can prove it to you, the only thing I can hope for is that being around me, you will remember." Sesshoumaru looked disappointed in a way.

"Not now, not with so many around, when we are alone I will tell you of my desires if you promise not to take advantage of them." Kagome implied so much more than what she actually intended.

Sesshoumaru growled, " I would never take advantage of you, or lie to you."

((so can you tell me if someone is lying or telling the truth)), she asked the voice in her head.

((You will already know the truth, but I can help you decipher if you have forgotten.))

((Thank you)) Kagome had to look away from Sesshoumaru she thought that he might be able to see that she was having a conversation within herself but if she had looked she would of seen that he was having a conversation too.

They all sat down at the table and began to eat. The entire time Sesshoumaru couldn't help but to think about her telling him her desires. For so long he has desired her.

"Kagome, once you remember everything, like I know that you will, I would love it if we could sit and bull shit about the old days." Sango looked at Kagome with hopes of starting a conversation.

"Well why don't you tell me some things about the past. I can reminisce with you even if I don't remember." Kagome wanted to remember she wanted to know about all the things that she didn't know about.

"Remember when you made Inuyasha sit so hard that he lost consciousness." Sango and Miroku started to laugh.

"What do you mean I made him sit?" Kagome was more than curious.

"There was this necklace before you and Sesshoumaru got together that Inuyasha had to wear and any time that you yelled sit he had to sit."

"Wow, that must have been nice." Kagome let a smile come over her face, "tell me more."

"You don't remember Kikyou or Naraku but I wish you could remember the battle where we killed them and you finished off Naraku once and for all."

"Well who are they." Kagome questioned.

"Kikyou was Inuyasha's mate here before he took you to the modern era." Shippou popped up.

"So why would we have killed his mate? Is that why he did this to me?"

"We killed her because she joined Naraku who was an evil half demon here, we had no choice. And it might have been one of the reasons that he took you but we think that it was to get back at me." Sesshoumaru spoke wounded.

"Why would he want to get back at you so badly?" Kagome now felt a little sorry for this strong demon.

"Because when you connected the jewel once we defeated Naraku, you didn't wish for him to be full demon, instead you wished for everyone who participated in the completion of the jewel would get what they most needed or desired. I got my heart back as he got freedom from his oath to Kikyou. he was jealous I already had power of all the land and then I had you cause my heart was open enough to see your heart."

"What was his oath to Kikyou?"

"That he would go to hell to be with her once the jewel was finished. That is why he is still here." Miroku spoke.

"So when Naraku was alive, who was the most powerful?"

"Those who fought with honor were stronger." Sesshoumaru said proudly.

"Yea, but those who fought with dishonor took us far to long to defeat." Miroku spoke honestly.

"Only because we had a traitor among us, and a ludicrous half blood. Not that I am against half bloods, but he was all about becoming full demon that he lost site on what actually mattered." Sesshoumaru seemed a little agitated at the thought of this unparticular past.

"So this Kikyou, what kind of person was she that she would betray you?" she looked directly at Sesshoumaru.

"She wanted your life, she believed that you had her spirit she was a walking dead carcass, and when she realized that we would not let her take your life, she decided to try and take it herself." It seemed as if there was pain flowing from Sesshoumaru's voice.

"Did I have her spirit? Was this evil apart of me?" Kagome looked back down at the table, moving her food around with her fork.

"No Kagome, You were never a part of her and she would never be apart of you. You are our sister, friend, mother, and mate? We know you don't know this but we all love you." Sango said in a way that made everyone look at her insightful words.

"So tell me about this battle, where these dreams came true."

Shippou was all excited that he could finally help his mother that he almost shouted, "I can show you, I can show you like a movie."

"How can you do that, son?"

Shippou was shocked because once again she had called him son. "I would have to use illusions and I would have to draw everyone's memory I can show you what everyone remembers, we would all have to hold hands."

"We are in," Sango and Miroku spoke simultaneously.

"Most of the memories would have to come from me, son, in order for her to see what she needs to see. I was the closest one." Sesshoumaru commanded.

"I guess I still can't help, I wasn't around at the time." Segome spoke.

"Neither was I sister, we could just stand by and watch." Rin said.

"But I wish I could help too." Whined Segome.

"You can help daughter, just being here helps, trust me." Kagome reassured her.

At that point Segome and Rin got up and moved to the end of the table as all the others came closer to one another so Shippou could pull from them. You could feel the energy flowing around the circle as Shippou started pulling the memories and a bright light showed in the middle of the table.

*The movie of the past*

the outer rims were fuzzy, but the picture in the center was the clearest. Kagome could see herself, she was human she looked like she did in the modern era. She saw herself and Sesshoumaru standing in the center facing a tall dark, long haired man and a woman that looked a lot like her standing next to him. it was silent. She pulled back the string on the bow, concentrating on the shot knowing that she had to make it count not seeing Kikyou come behind her. Sesshoumaru saw Kikyou move behind Kagome and grab her arrow half way as she held it above Kagome. He started to move towards her when at that moment Kagome released her bow as she was pierced from behind by kikyou's arrow. He was too late to save Kagome but he did take vengeance on Kikyou. He used his poison claws jamming them into Kikyou filling her with his poison and watched as she fell to the ground beside Kagome. As Naraku fell to the ground his minions disappeared and the jewel glided to Kagome making the jewel she held in her hands complete. Sesshoumaru stood above her as she placed her hands together around the jewel as if she was praying. In her dieing breath she wished for all who helped with the completion of the jewel to have what they most needed or desired. As everyone realized what was happening they all filtered into the center. A light pink glow surrounded all that were gathered around Kagome as the light vanished you could see that all were healed of their wounds and that Rin had been brought to Sesshoumaru's side. The power of the jewel had brought Rin to Sesshoumaru. You could see that Sesshoumaru eyes were softer than they had ever been. Rin was changed into a demoness like her father, Miroku's curse of the wind tunnel had vanished and him and Sango had become demonic. The only people that you could not see a drastic change in was Kagome, Inuyasha, and Sesshoumaru. But knowing the oath that Inuyasha had with Kikyou the fact that he was still there made them understand what he had received. The others at that point looked confusingly wondering what Sesshoumaru and Kagome had received.

*End of past movie*

"So what did we get Sesshoumaru?" Kagome asked.

"I got my heart, and you became demon. My demon mate."

"Why didn't it show me changing?"

"Because all desires must have been fulfilled before yours came to be."

"why did you just receive your heart? How did you loose your heart?"

"For all I needed to be complete was my heart, you had already given me my arm which was my other missing piece."

"That still doesn't answer how you lost your heart, and now how did you loose your arm."

"as far as my heart is concerned I was taught to be cold fore there was no reason for me to have it, my arm well you had something to do with that." Sesshoumaru spoke sheepishly.

"What did I have to do with it, and if I took away why would I give it back."

"You are the one that gave my brother the sword that took my arm, you gave it back to me in your own words because you wanted me to reflect my name."

"What is your name?" Kagome asked.

"Sesshoumaru."

"I mean what does it mean?"

"Umm.. killing perfection."

"How romantic." She was being playful.

"Only you would know if I am truly the killing perfection." Sesshoumaru bounced back.

"Well maybe that part I will have to be reminded." She caught the sly remark that he had made and knew that he was talking about the little death that came from physical pleasure.

"Been waiting on you."

"Well I hope you haven't waited to long that you have forgotten."

"it is as much a part of me as breathing I would never forget how to please you."

"Hey, we are all here… remember?" Segome interrupted.

"Sorry, she unlocked the cage I had to answer to let her know I was still here."

"Yea, yea, yea… whatever." Shippou laughed.

"Segome that is how you came to be, don't be mocking it." Rin giggled.

"Don't remind me."

"Hey I wanted reminding." Sesshoumaru sneered.

"Hey I just want to remember what it was like to conceive and to give birth."

"UMM. I can help you with that." Sesshoumaru spoke again.

"well I think I need to get some memories back first, and then we will see." Kagome shied away.

"Hey now there are kids, remember? I mean come on I am perverted but not in front of children." Miroku piped up.

"Sorry," both Kagome and Sesshoumaru spoke at the same time.

(You didn't mean that?) smirked the voice in her head.

(I know, I think I am beginning to like all of this) Kagome thought.

(Well, if you want to remember what exactly it was like, I am sure that he would gladly take you up on it.)

(Later I will tell him of my desires, you think this is moving too fast?)

(depends, do you believe him that you have a past?)

(It is making more since, a kiss would be a step in the right direction.)

"Hell ya," screamed Sesshoumaru.

"What was that for?" Segome asked seeing her mother look at him with suspicion.

"Umm… just thinking about the past." Sesshoumaru blushed.

"yea right dad." Rin knew too well that her father was thinking of more than that.

(you there?) came the voice again.

(where did you go?) Kagome asked the voice, suspicious that he was sesshoumaru.

(I have been talking to you, I think you were distracted.)

(can we continue this conversation later?)

(As you wish my lady. Have too much on your mind?) the voice toyed with her.

(Well you can read my mind, you tell me.)

(I don't read your mind unless you give me permission, do I have it?)

(Yes, but I am distracted right now.)

(Well with that I will let you go for now. Remember I am here.)

(Thanks again, bye.)

When she had returned to the others she sat back and listened to there nonchalant conversation, she couldn't help but to keep thinking about the conversation earlier with Sesshoumaru and how easy it was to toy with him.

Sesshoumaru stared at Kagome as she watched the others. He admired her, and he wanted her to remember. he loved the playfulness they had earlier and he was hoping he wouldn't lose it again. he was getting aroused just sitting there watching her. In reaction he lifted his hand and lightly grazed that placed his mate mark would have been on his chest. He noticed her reaction.

She felt the heat rise within her; all of a sudden she felt her legs quiver. She knew she kept getting this exciting feeling but when she looked around the room she didn't notice anyone doing anything. Then her eyes met with Sesshoumaru, she reached up to the back of her neck and rubbed her mate mark.

She saw his eyes light up, she felt like she could feel his arousal. She knew then what the voice had been telling her and that Sesshoumaru had a mark as well as she did.

Sesshoumaru feeling every move she made look down into his shirt when he saw that his mate mark was back and that it was burning. He let a growl slip between his lips.

The rest of the group heard his growl and could feel the tension growing as they saw the two demons looking at one another they grabbed the children and quietly and slowly arose from the table and left the dinning room to give the two alone time.

The two had not even noticed that the rest of the group had left; they had even forgotten that they were there. They were lost in torturing one another constantly rubbing their marks. It was like they were trying to see which one would cave first.

Back and forth they went the growl's between them getting stronger and stronger, the heat in both of them arising so high, an outsider would say that it had become a boiler room. Sesshoumaru couldn't stand it anymore he leaned over and grabbed her hand that was on the back of her neck. Leaving his arm around her and kissed her fully. His other hand steadying him so he wouldn't just collapse on her. There kisses continued as their inner demons were fighting to get out. "Mine," she heard him growl.

She pushed her hands up in front of her. "wait a minute, I didn't say now."

"Come on please, no more torture, my mate." He said falling to his knees.

"Well, we will have to see." She arose from the table and cockily walked out of the dinning room.

Everyone in the palace could hear Sesshoumaru's growl as he tried to readjust himself and his thinking.

When she reached the gardens she collapsed onto the bench still trying to calm herself down, she couldn't believe she had let herself lose that much control so quickly, she had to remember. She didn't want to continue on this blind journey. She heard his growl, she felt his suffering, knowing all too well herself. Why had she put him through that? Did she really care? She knew that she did, but she didn't want to be too easy. How was she suppose to tell him that she wanted him, that she had a desire within her for him and she had no clue why. they told her why but she didn't know whether or not to trust that instinct about him she had trusted it with Inuyasha and look where it got her.

Why did she do this to him, didn't she see how much he cared about her? He was getting angry, he was so close. He blamed himself for kissing her. Was she mad? Was she scared? He had never been rejected, specially not from the woman that he loved. The anger grew inside of him. he couldn't tell whether she was taunting with him or whether she did it to piss him off. But the anger continued to grow until he couldn't take it anymore and he took off out into the forest. As he was running through the forest his full state took over. He couldn't think clearly. Damn those fucking woman he thought.

(are you there?) her voice came into his head.

(what are you after?) the voice replied to her.

(I think I fucked up, I am sure that you know what I am talking about.) she knew that the voice was apart of her and knew what she had done.

(Well let's see, YES, I would say you fucked up.)

(what was I suppose to do? Does he think me that easy?)

(He didn't say you were easy, you just teased him to the point of no return.) replied the voice.

(Are you male or female?) she asked the voice.

(can't you tell by my voice?)

(Ok, so you are male, tell me how would you feel if that had happened to you?)

(The same way he does, only I don't think I could of stopped. Listen, you get a demon riled up specially your mate who has been without you for so long, you can expect repercussions.)

(Like what?) she asked worried.

(Do you wish him to turn from you? Is that what you want?)

(No, yes, no… I don't know. It would be easier if I remembered everything.)

(well until there is no doubt, you won't?)

(Who doubt's and what do they doubt?) she asked.

(You Kagome Higurashi doubt your heritage and your mate.)

(Wouldn't you if you were in my shoes?)

At that point just hearing her voice calmed Sesshoumaru down out of his full state where he could think a little bit clearer. (have been in your shoes, but have to give them a chance.)

(How do I apologize to him, and tell him that I desire him, that I am just scared?) Kagome had a tear drop from her eye.

(The same way that you have just shared that with me.)

(But he probably won't talk to me now.) more tears started flowing heavier.

(What if I told you that I could arrange for him to be there right now. That I know beyond a reasonable doubt that he wants to be with you, and that he desires you more than anything he has ever breathed in his entire life?)

(I would ask you how, and how do you know he feels those things?)

(just because you have lost your memory doesn't mean I have. I know how that demon feels about you.)

(Ok so how could you get him here?)

(You already have.)

(What?)

(He is standing behind you my dear, your tears brought him to your side.)

(Why hasn't he made an advancement towards me?)

(He chooses not to scare you, he is waiting on you. All you have to do is whisper his name, that will let him know that it is ok and then his presence you shall feel.)

Sesshoumaru had left the forest and had come up behind Kagome during this conversation. "Sesshoumaru," the sweet words blowing through his ears made his heart start beating again as he bent over and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I am sorry Kagome, a kiss forbidden, but maybe a future permitted."

No more was said as they sat there holding one another as the flowers were blooming around them and the sun was getting ready to set. After the time went by her silence was frightening, to make sure she was ok he moved the hair from the back of her neck and went to catch her scent when he noticed the mark had returned. He couldn't help but to just once lick his tongue over the fang indentation left there.

Kagome melted further into Sesshoumaru's embrace so much that she wanted to tell him, so much that she wanted to say, but still for some reason she was so scared that he would turn her away.

"Don't be sad, please don't cry."

"I'm not there to wipe the tear from your eye."

"Laugh a little laugh, Smile a little Smile,"

"I Promise it will be ok in a little while."

He whispered those words in her ear and she felt the same comfort that she had felt before. He didn't turn from her then why would he turn from her now.

"Sesshoumaru…"

"Not now Kagome, please let me enjoy this moment that I have so longed for with you." He held her tighter.

Soon later Segome not really wanting to disturb their time together came out into the garden. "Dinner is ready, if you two love birds wish to join the rest of the group."

"Segome, we will be there soon. Leave us."

"Ok dad, but you can't have her all to yourself all the time." She said playfully.

"Not now Segome, I know you are playing but not like that, not right now."

"Yes, father."

Segome went back into the mansion to join the others. After a couple of minutes Kagome turned around and looked in Sesshoumaru's eyes. "I promise you, I will have faith in you until such time that you give me reason not to, promise me that you will never hurt me?"

"Kagome NoTaishou, formally Kagome Higurashi, I promise on the life of the moon goddess I will never harm you. I will love you till the day I die, believe me in that."

"I do." She did believe him, she didn't know why but she knew that he was all that she wanted at this moment in time.


End file.
